Sunday Scoop

I have quite a few updates to cover, so let’s dig right in, shall we?

Dating

I’m actually glad I waited to update this, because I was confused for about a week or so, and then as it usually happens, things clarified themselves pretty quickly.

Let’s start with TR.  Technically, we’re not dating, since we were getting together for dinner “as friends.”  Still, it had been a few months since we’d seen each other, and I was a bit nervous about how it would go. It was nice that TR had asked me to bring Sofi, because the dogs automatically eased whatever awkwardness there would have been.  Both dogs love playing together, something that TR commented on a few times that evening.  He’d prepared a really special dinner for me: grilled Italian sausage, risotto made from scratch, grilled onions & bell peppers, and a beautiful salad with artichoke hearts, chopped olives, tomatoes, and a yummy vinaigrette. We also had some really great red wine.  The fact that he put in so much effort to make such a lovely dinner really made me feel special.  We enjoyed the food, took a long walk after dinner with the dogs, and then came back and watched a bit of TV.  Things definitely stayed at the friend level, but being around him reminded me of how much I enjoyed hanging out with him.  We have so many things in common – our Italian heritage, our love of local sports teams, cooking/eating great food, and our dogs.  He’s classy, fun, and there’s just something there.  On my part.  And maybe on his too, because he mentioned that he never got my recipe for pesto when I cooked for him in the summer, to which I replied, “so are you saying you’d like a live demonstration?” He said he did.  So we have plans for him and his pup to come over soon so I can make pesto for him and he can copy down the recipe.  (Or maybe it’s just an excuse for us to hang out again?). One of my friends asked me why I’m still hanging out with him, because if I had my way, we’d still be dating, and he says that he doesn’t want to since I don’t want to have kids and he does.  She thinks I’m setting myself up for disappointment, and that it must be so difficult.  I told her that I really do like spending time with him, and that if I’m honest, I am hoping that somehow he changes his mind and decides that he’d like to start dating again at some point.  And besides, it’s not like I’m not dating other people and pinning all my romantic hopes on him. But I do see her point, and maybe I’ll eventually feel like the situation is too frustrating.

Moving on to the sheriff…he came over two weeks ago and we hung out watching Sunday Night Football and getting a little more physical (I’ll spare the details, nothing too serious happened). One good thing is that my worries about the way my body looks weren’t an issue that night at all.  I’ve come to realize that if I’m with the right person, someone who makes me feel like he adores me, the issues I have with my body won’t really come into play.  The evening left me very confused because I just wasn’t physically attracted to sheriff, and I’m not talking about anything that happened when we were making out, but more in just how he looks in general.  I know that sounds pretty shallow, but attraction is important.  So I began the week not knowing what I was going to do, if I wanted to continue seeing him, or if I should cut it off.  We were texting everyday, but I was moving more toward letting him go.  And then this past Tuesday, when the Ferguson verdict came out, he texted me some photos that were in very poor taste, bordering on racist.  We hadn’t even said hello or good morning, and he was sending me photos about the looting and rioting that were really disgusting.  Not that I condone looting and rioting, but I know he was doing it to see if he could get me going. I didn’t reply to the first photo, because he’d sent it in a group text, but after the second photo came through to just me, I had to respond:

Me: not funny

Sheriff: I think it’s hilarious

Me: that’s the crux of the problem

Sheriff: (I won’t repeat his response, but he went into this whole diatribe about how the liberal media was making it about race, when it clearly wasn’t about race)

WTF? Is he serious right now?  This was just too much for me.

Me: Listen, I don’t want to debate this with you. Those pictures you sent me were in poor taste and showed a side of yourself that I don’t want to get to know better.

And that was that.  Problem solved.  Confusion over.  No response, and we’re done.  And to be honest with you, I haven’t given him a second thought since.  I knew that dating someone who holds such different ideologies from me wouldn’t work.  At first I thought his views were more moderate, but those photos and his subsequent response showed that he and I hold much different views on race, justice, etc.  So it’s time to move on.  And before you think I’ve made these decisions because of TR, I didn’t.  The confusion with the sheriff started before I went over to TR’s for dinner, although after the dinner I did feel like the connection I feel with TR was lacking with the sheriff.

At the moment there are no other people on eHarmony that I’m interested in, but I get new matches daily, so who knows.  Plus, I’m actually hoping to just meet someone when I’m out and about.  There’s no rush, and I don’t feel any pressure to “get a boyfriend,” so I’m just going to stay open and see who comes my way.

Health

These past couple of months my weight has been at a standstill.  Mostly because I haven’t been putting as much effort into working out and eating as I should have been.  I haven’t been going wild with food, and I have been getting in workouts a few times a week, but I’ve basically been in maintenance mode. Which actually makes me happy to know that I can successfully maintain my weight…when the time comes.  But that time isn’t here yet.  I have 20 pounds or so to lose, and I’m determined to get back on the losing track.

I know lots of people would look at the calendar, see the holiday season coming, and say, just get back to it in January.  But that’s not me.  Why let a whole month go by without working towards my goals?  After all, I’m not that into sweets, so holiday treats don’t tempt me, and Christmas Eve and Christmas Day are just two days, two meals, really.  So there’s no reason not to start back tomorrow, December 1st.

As luck would have it, I was on Instagram the other day when I saw that Fit Girls Worldwide posted about a Winter Wonderland 28-Day Challenge that was beginning December 1st.  So I decided to buy their guide and join in on it.

The meal plan is fairly simple, full of well-balanced meals that are pretty easy to make.  The guide comes with a shopping list for the week, which makes it very convenient.  Because the meal plan is all about eating clean, healthy food, it does require meal prep.  Luckily I don’t mind cooking, and I love that the guide gives tips on how when to prep which meals, which makes it very organized.  I am going to have to modify the portions, but other than that, the meal plan looks good.  At first I was put off a bit that there are only two different dinner ideas for the week, because I am all about variety. Then I realized that the meal guide is perfectly planned so that it uses up all the food on the shopping list for the week, and I know that I normally throw out extra food that I can’t eat when I cook too many different dinners. So sacrificing a bit of  variety for less food waste is something I’m willing to try.  The plan doesn’t include as much protein at each meal as I’m used to having, but I’m willing to give it a shot for 28 days to see how it works.

Making December Spectacular

My goal for this week is to be active each day, include 5 TIU workouts, stick to this new food plan, and check in a lot on Instagram.  I’m looking forward to starting the last month of the year tomorrow with a renewed energy and a great plan.  I’m motivated and excited!

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Monday Musings – Weekend Wrapup

It’s been quite an eventful weekend, so I thought I’d do a wrap-up post to catch you guys up.

Halloween

This Halloween was quite eventful for me.  Not only did I go as Vampira on the Halloween boat cruise last Friday (10/25), but I wore two different costumes on the 31st.  I wore a cozy, comfy Eeyore costume to work on Friday because the other teachers who work at the district office with me decided we should go as animals.  I didn’t have a costume idea in mind at all, so luckily my mentoring partner had the Eeyore costume and let me borrow it.  It definitely wasn’t the most flattering thing ever, but since the day was rainy and cold, it was pretty perfect.  When we stepped out to get some goodies for a Halloween lunch we were having later that day, so many people at the grocery store came up and told us how cute we looked (she was wearing a similar giraffe costume).

I was heading to Tinkerbell’s house on Friday night for a passing out candy Halloween party.  I knew I wanted to be comfortable, so the Vampira costume was out; but I also wanted to look pretty, so the Eeyore outfit was out too.  I found the perfect thing on Amazon – a Wonder Woman tshirt, complete with cape and headband.  I decided to put the false eyelashes I wore for Vampira on, too, and I loved the way it looked:

closeup of the makeup

I had a great time that night, passing out candy to the tons of kids who showed up at Tinkerbell’s house, spending time with her family and friends, and just enjoying  the evening. One of the best parts of the night was that so many people told me how thin I looked.  People that had seen me just a few weeks ago asked how much more weight I’d lost. I’ve actually stayed the same for the past couple of months, although I do know I’ve lost inches. I also think it was the new (size 10!!) jeans.  It always feels awesome to get complimented about weight loss and looking healthier.

Dating

Thanks for everyone’s positive and encouraging comments about my date with Fireman.  We had a great night, but throughout the week I hadn’t heard too much from him.  The week before he was really attentive via texts and calls, and I knew this week he was on vacation (although he was staying home), so I wasn’t sure if he was just extra  busy.  I heard from him almost everyday, but his texts didn’t have the same flirtation that they had the week before.  And I just knew that something was off, and that probably he’d lost interest.  So finally yesterday I just texted him and asked, and he responded with the fact that he had a great time on our first date, and that he thinks I’m beautiful, BUT (I knew there was a but coming), he just didn’t feel a love  connection and didn’t think he could commit to a second date.  I was disappointed, but since I had the feeling that’s what was going on, I wasn’t surprised.  It’s not so much the fact that this particular guy wasn’t interested, but more the fact that I seem to be so unlucky in love.  I really don’t know what it is.  I know my bold personality isn’t for everyone, but there has to be SOMEone out there who would appreciate it.  As luck would have it, last night seemed to be a busy night for me on eHarmony, with several matches contacting me and wanting to move through the question process.  So, we’ll see.  I’m not going to get overly excited, but I’m going to keep an open mind. Sometimes it’s hard not to lose hope and get depressed, but I’m not into dwelling in that headspace for too long.  I like to look on the brighter side of life, so that’s what I’m going to do.

 November Goals

• Blog 2-3 times a week, comment on blogs on the days I write
• Exercise: cardio 6 days a week, toning at least 3 days
• Continue eating healthy
• Log food/exercise in MyFitnessPal daily
• Read 30 minutes a day
• Run the entire Turkey Trot 5K
• Go on dates

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Going Outside My Comfort Zone: I Have a Date!

(I’m not so sure about the staying up late…yet)

As you guys know, I signed up for Match.com at the beginning of December.  Up to this point, there have been quite a few guys who have winked, liked photos, and even emailed me, but very few who truly sparked my interest.  And of those, fewer still whose attention I seemed to hold for longer than the time it took them to contact me.

What is it with guys who contact you, wink at you, and “like” every photo you have on your profile, only to disappear after you email them back?  It’s just as well,  I don’t need someone who’s not able to give me his attention for more than a day. I’m sure it just wasn’t meant to be.  Oh, and to the guy who sent me the note asking, “is it true what they day about not trusting a big butt and a smile?” all I had to say to him was…REALLY?! (Oh, I have some doozies I could share, but maybe that’s for another post).

There have been a couple of guys who I’ve communicated with back and forth on Match.com email, and I found them to be intriguing enough to consider meeting up for coffee/drinks.  So I waited, answered their emails, and waited some more.

And then I decided to do something I would normally never do – I decided to suggest that we meet up for coffee.  Now I now this will probably surprise those of you who know me in real life or even through this blog.  I’m so bold, so confident, so strong – why would making the first move be weird for me?  Because I am a traditional girl when it comes to dating.  I like the guy to make the first move; that way I know he’s really into me, and isn’t just being nice.  But I threw caution to the wind and sent this message to the two guys I was interested in:

I hope you’ve had a great new year’s so far. Mine has been really nice. I love how the beginning of a new year is so full of possibility & promise.

With that said, I’m going to go way outside my comfort zone and ask if you’d like to meet up sometime for coffee. I’m interested in getting to know you better, and I think there’s only so much you can learn online. My number is xxx-xxx-xxxx if you’d like to text/call me and set something up.

And you know what?  It worked!  One of the guys, whom I’ll refer to as CannoliD (because he has a great photo of himself eating a cannoli in Rome on his profile)  responded the very next day, and we’re going to go to coffee late next week.  We haven’t set up the specific date yet because he’s not feeling well, but I think it will be on Saturday.

How fun!  I’m not going into this with any expectations, other than to get to know him better.  The small amount I do know from CannoliD’s profile and our emails are all things that I really like:

• 40 years old
• no kids
• has a professional job
• has a college degree, in fact, he attended my same college
• is from my city
• owns his own home
• is Italian!
• is a dog owner (he also has a cat, but I’m not going to hold that against him. Have I ever mentioned my huge fear of cats?  They FREAK me out! Don’t judge, some people are scared of little, tiny spiders)
• has the sweetest smile
• seems like a genuinely nice guy

I don’t want to make too much of this because who knows if there will even be a second date, but I will say that I’m looking forward to it.  If for no other reason than that it’s been 5 years (has it REALLY been that long?!) since I’ve been on a date, and I’m ready to get back out there and see what happens.

Wish me luck!

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#Reverb13, Day 30: Relationships

Throughout the month of December, I’ll be participating in #reverb13: Reverb is a way to reflect on the past year and project into the next year with a prompt a day for 31 days.  December is the perfect time to reflect on 2013 and start to create intentions for 2014.

Day 30: Relationships

Relationships | Did you find a new best friend?  Delve deeper into a relationship?  Break up?  Get back together?  Tell us about who you added – or subtracted – from your life.  Why?

My friendships are so important to me, and I try to nurture them as much as possible.  Now that we’re in our 40s and busy with jobs, families, and other obligations, getting together is a lot more challenging.  Still, I try to make sure I get together with each of my friends (and sometimes a few of them at once) for coffee or something at least once a month.  Most of my friends are girls I’ve known since high school, and it’s really fantastic to know people that long.  These are tried-and-true friends.  Ride or die chicks.  Girls who have seen me through everything, and me them. We’ll always be in each other’s lives.  One major goal I have in 2014, which I started at the end of 2013 is to get together with them much more often.  To do things together, not just coffee and convo, but getting out and about and doing fun things, too.

One friendship that has blossomed in 2013 is with Tinkerbell.  She and I really started to hang out at the very beginning of January 2013, and our friendship has grown so much over the course of this year.  We have so much in common, including both getting the VSG. It’s fantastic having someone in real life to discuss all the issues that come up with having had weight loss surgery.  But beyond that, we have similar values, live in the same neighborhood (within 5 minutes driving), and like to do the same things. Tinkerbell is incredible supportive, so generous, and absolutely inspiring.  Whenever I see her post about her long runs on MyFitnessPal, I get motivated to do my walk/run intervals.  We have a great time shopping, getting our hair blown out, and delving into more serious topics, too.  I’m so grateful that we’ve become so close, and consider her one of my best friends.

A few of my most cherished friends are women who have moved far from me, but the distance doesn’t inhibit our friendship because of this great age of technology.  It’s not quite the same as being in the same room, but being able to check in on Facebook share our daily smiles through photos and statuses helps us stay connected.  Plus, with things like Facetime and texting, we can keep up with each other as if we did live in the same city.

And then there are the blogging buddies, pals on MFP, and WLS peeps on YouTube and FB  who have offered me so much support, encouragement, and happiness that they are definitely people I count among my friends, even though we’ve never met.  I am so thankful to have them in my lives.

In terms of romantic relationships, I recently signed up for Match.com, and while I find the entire process terribly slow, it has given me a bit of a boost to know that some of these men find me attractive enough to email, wink at, or contact.  I haven’t dated in years, and now that I’ve put myself back out there, I’m really hoping that 2014 brings me some fun dates (or maybe something even more serious) in the love department.

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FMM: Relationships & Dating

Happy Monday! It’s been a few weeks since I’ve been able to write up an FMM post, and I’m really looking forward to participating.  This weekend was a fun one – I went to a Beauty Trend Show at Nordstrom on Saturday and treated myself to a couple of products as a reward for losing 90 pounds.  Sunday I spent the day with family, watching my 49ers lose, and saying goodbye to Dexter as I watched the series finale.

But let’s get to this week’s Friend Makin’ Monday. I’m really interested in this week’s topic because after years of taking myself off the market when it comes to dating, I think I *may* finally be ready to dip my toe in the pond.  My friends keep encouraging me to join an online dating site, and I think I may do it next month.  (One of my goals for the year was to join an online dating site before the end of November, so this would be a bit ahead of schedule).

If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section at: www.alltheweigh.com so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!

 

FMM: Relationships and Dating

1.  List five characteristics that you think are important in a significant other.

1. Attraction – It’s not all about looks, but I do think being physically attracted to someone is a big factor.
2. Intelligence – He’s got to match me, otherwise I’ll be bored.
3. Financial Security – I want my guy to at least make what I do, which isn’t too difficult, considering the paltry sum I get paid to teach.
4. Ambition – I’m very ambitious, both with my career and in the goals I’ve set for myself, and it would be better if my guy was of a similar mindset.
5. Fun – It’s really important that we can have a good time together.  Our idea of how we like to spend leisure time should match up.

2.  If you had to choose between staying single for the next two years (as in, no dating at all,) or receiving $10,000, which would you choose?  At first I thought I’d take the money, but $10,000 isn’t enough to for two years.  If it was $50K or more, I’d probably choose the money. I’m used to being single (I haven’t dated in 4 years), and I can always use more money.

3.  What is your relationship status?  Are you satisfied with it?  I’m single and have been for longer than I can remember.  Even when I was dating over 4 years ago, it wasn’t really a “significant other” situation.  So, I guess I’d say I’m very comfortable with the life I’ve created, but having someone romantic in my life would be a nice addition.

4.  Would you date someone who has children?  Since I’ve made the decision not to have children, I’d prefer if the guy I’m dating doesn’t have children living with him.  Or has children who are older – late teens.

5.  Would you date someone who’s shorter than you?  No.  I’m 5″3′ and I don’t want to date someone who’s less than 5″9′ in his socks.  I like taller guys.

6.  Would you date someone who has different political views?  No, I’d find it difficult to date someone who’s core beliefs were vastly different from my own.

7.  If you were going on vacation together, would you choose the beach or the mountains?  It really depends.  I think both venues could be really romantic.  I love the beach (obvi – blog title and all), but cozying up in a mountain cabin could be really fun, too.

8.  How do you show someone that you’re interested in them?  Flirting?  It’s been so long I’m wayyyyy out of practice.  I think in person, it’s all about eye contact.

9.  Do you prefer to date people who are older than you or younger?  It really doesn’t matter. I think I’m young at heart, so I could date younger very easily.  But as long as the person had the characteristics I’m looking for, older would be fine, too.

10.  Share some details of your dream date. A dream date would be anything the guy put effort into planning.  I have lots of interests and can enjoy all sorts of venues, so something that meant he was thinking of me as he figured it out would mean a lot and really impress me.

Now it’s your turn to answer the questions!   And also be sure to go back to Kenlie’s blog and leave a link to your FMM post in the comments!  I really encourage you to comment on as many people’s posts as you can – I’ve met some fantastic people through FMM.  You never know who you’ll meet today.

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FMM: All the Single Ladies

Happy Monday, Everyone! I almost skipped today’s FMM because of the subject, but then I decided that it was time to stop avoiding the whole issue of dating, as I’ve been doing for the last couple of years.  This one definitely challenged me, which is good to do every now and then, right?

If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section at: www.alltheweigh.com so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!

FMM: All The Single Ladies (and Gents)

1. What is your current relationship status?  Are you happy with that status?  Single.  I’ve been single for so long that sometimes I do wonder if I’m meant to meet “the one,” or even “the maybe.”  For the last few years I’ve put dating on the extreme back burner in pursuit of my goals, especially weight loss goals.  Still, even though it’s been my choice not to date, I’m not sure how many interested parties I’d find if I was “out there.”

2. Do you find it enjoyable to take care of someone in addition to yourself, or do you prefer to be responsible only for yourself? In the past I’ve chosen people who needed someone to care for them – more than what was healthy.  It’s one of the things I’m working on with my therapist – how to allow myself to find someone who doesn’t need me to be in control.  To be ok with compromise, etc.  So, I’d like to answer, that yes, I’d prefer to be responsible only for myself.  Although I love being able to show my love through cooking and doing other nice things for the other person.

3.  What’s the most important physical characteristic in your mate/potential mate? A good-looking face. I’m attracted to people with olive skin and dark hair (like me).

4. What’s the most important (non-physical) characteristic in your mate/potential mate?  I’m looking for that rare combination of characteristics that includes someone who is young at heart, down to earth, and fun to be around.  I like guys that are quick-witted and funny.  I like someone with ambition and drive.  And I also like someone whom I can trust and who will be honest with me.  Is that too much?  Maybe that’s why I’m single.  😉

5. Is it important to you that your significant other have the same hobbies and interests as you?  I actually think it makes it more fun to have some different interests, so that we can learn more from each other.  Plus, it gives us separate outlets so that we’re not spending every waking minute together.  Of course, I do think that we should share some of the same hobbies and interests, otherwise we won’t have much in common.

6. If you could go out on a date with a celebrity who would it be?  You guys are expecting me to say Johnny Depp, and while he would be fun to date, I’m going to go a bit unexpected.  I’ve been doing an American film unit with my classes, and we’re currently watching Godfather, Part 2 (yes, I had parental permission slips), and to me, there is really no one better looking than a young Robert DeNiro:

Those eyes, that face, the beauty mark…plus he’s Italian?  Forgetabouit!

But ok, ok, there’s no way to time travel and date a young DeNiro, so if I have to choose a current celebrity, I guess I’d say yes to going out with

Yes, that’s Joe Manganiello.  Of True Blood and Spider Man fame.  Another Italian boy.  See a pattern?  Of course this one is taller and has more muscles…I guess I can work with that.  🙂

7. What’s your idea of a good first date? Anything but dinner and a movie, which is just so cliche. Plus, it’s hard to get to know someone while you’re sitting in a dark theatre.  I think movies are great dates, but after you’ve gotten to know the person a bit.  Doing something active is always fun so that if there is a bit of a lull in the  conversation, we still have something else to do.  I like guys to show thought and be creative, so I’d really be up for most things.

8. Are there any traits/habits that you’d consider a deal breaker?  Not having a job would absolutely be a deal breaker.  I’d prefer the person I’m dating to be at least as successful as I am.  It’s not about the money, but about the drive and commitment.  And, ok, it’s not really difficult to make as much money as I do, since I’m a teacher, so it is about the money, a little bit.

9. Okay ladies…Facial Hair: Yes, or No? Sure, I’m fine with it. Probably not a full on Zach Galifianakis beard, but something more trimmed and neat would be just fine.

10.  Would you marry someone who is opposed to diamond engagement rings?  If the guy is so counterculture that he opposes diamond engagement rings, we probably don’t have enough in common to even date, let alone be at that point.

11. What do you wish you could do differently in your next relationship?  Gosh, it’s been so long since I’ve been in a relationship that this is hard to answer.  In general in my life I’m working on being less controlling, so I’m sure that would be one.  And as independent as I am, I sometimes get a bit needy in terms of wanting the person to show me attention (calls, emails, etc), so maybe that, too.  In other words, I’m often the one showing more affection.  I hate feeling like I like the guy more than he likes me.  So in my next relationship, I’d like it to be at least 50-50, or skewed a bit in my favor, maybe, with him liking me a touch more than I like him.

12. Is there anyone from your past that you’d like to date again now? I used to think that I wanted to get back together with my first real love, the guy I was engaged to, but I’ve recently realized that I was just idealizing that relationship.  I do think that everything happens for a reason, and I’m sure that him breaking it off with me was for the best (this is all said in hindsight, it’s taken years to come to this).  So, no.  No looking backward for me – only forward progress.

13. Describe your worst first date story ever.  OMG!  I could write a book.  Seriously, for a while there in the early 2000s I was doing quite a bit of online dating and I dated some real doozies.  Like the guy that had ADD and a huge swastika  tattoo, which covered his entire back.  He took me bowling and to Mexican food in Japantown (you can imagine how good that was), and got really upset when I wouldn’t let him kiss me at the end of the date.  *shudder*  And that’s one of the good ones.

14. Describe the perfect date with your significant other. I don’t think there is one perfect date.  I think it’s a feeling you get from the other person where you look around you and realize that you wouldn’t want to be doing anything but exactly what you’re doing in that moment.  That’s perfect.

15.  Would you date someone shorter than you? Well, since I’m 5″3′, it’s difficult to find someone shorter than me.  (Although back in those online dating days, there was one guy who was my exact height, if you can believe it).  So, no.  I actually prefer a much taller  guy, around 6″ or so.

16. Share one (or a few) bonus traits that would be fun to find in an significant other (even if they aren’t as important as other traits.)  I’d love to date someone who was Italian (in case you couldn’t guess) and maybe from the East Coast.  I love the accents from the outer NYC area, as well as Boston.  There’s something about being Italian that only other Italians really understand.  And I think my personality is more like those you’d find on the East Coast – there’s an intensity to me that most of the people I know just don’t understand.

17. What’s one thing you’d like to do with a significant other that you’ve never done with another?  I’ve done a lot of different things with the guys I’ve dated over the years….Hmmm, maybe have it last?  That would be new.

18.  PDA: Yes, or No?  Sure, a little is nice.  Nothing graphic or inappropriate, though.

19. Do you kiss on the first date? Why not?  If we’re both feeling it.

20. Who, if anyone, makes your heart flutter?  No fluttering for this heart, at the moment.

 Now it’s your turn to share. Don’t forget to go back to Kenlie’s blog to link up in the comments!

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This ‘n’ That Thursday

It’s been a while since I wrote a “mish-mosh” post, and since I have lots of little things to share with you (none of which would require an entire blog post), I figured this would be fun.

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“The Crush.” I’m not even sure this is update-worthy.  Let me begin by saying I think I have lost any “Game” I once had.  I am so out of practice with flirting/reading signs from the opposite sex, that it is a bit pathetic.  (Especially considering my age!).  Still, I know some of you are interested.

Taking the advice of Scale Warfare and others, I decided to text Crush the other day.  Our conversation was short, but in it I asked him if he had voted yet (it was Election Day), and he said he had “been to (sic) busy.” Ok, so first, I hate the misspelling of the homonym and secondly, I really hate it when people don’t appreciate that voting isn’t just a right, but a duty.  I thought that he got a bit turned off by me saying that he needed to vote, and that turned me off.  As I wrote to SW, if he isn’t someone who likes an intelligent girl, then he’s not the guy for me. I was about to write him off altogether, and then he texted me last night: (“Crush” is in grey, I’m in green) (Also, forgive my terrible photoshop skills)

I didn’t really know what else to say, which is why I brought up this girl I used to work with that is also a friend of his on Facebook.  Lame!

As you guys can see, the whole text conversation was fairly ridiculous, right?  It’s also pretty clear (and I knew this) that Crush uses a lot more slang than I do.  Which isn’t a bad thing, necessarily, but I am looking for someone who can hold his own with me, intellectually.  Crush might be able to, but I’m not sure.

So, we’ll see if it moves beyond awkward texting to him asking me to coffee or drinks or something. While I have no expectations at all, I think it might be fun to see him and hang out a bit. (I flirt much better in person than via text, at least I used to).

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My new scale is awesome!  I love how I can just step right on it and don’t need to tap first with my toe.  Plus, I can get on it 4 or 5 times, and it gives the same weight readout each time, as it should.  My old scale was past its prime and lacked accuracy toward the end there.

I was happy to see that I lost 0.2 pounds from yesterday.  Now, I’m not one of those people who is weighs herself everyday.  In fact, I try to stay off the scale as much as possible.  But I think I may try daily weigh-ins this week, just to see if it helps keep me on track more than once-a-week-weighing does.  Just sort of experimenting.

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I’m looking forward to another personal training session with Robbie today.  I haven’t seen him since last Friday, and I need an intense workout.  I was supposed to do 3 sessions this week, but Tuesday I ate some room temperature Greek yogurt (never do that!) and felt pretty nauseous all day, so I had to cancel our session.  So I’m meeting with him today and tomorrow, just to get our two sessions in this week.  I haven’t done back-to-back sessions before, so we’ll see how it goes. He had mentioned that he wanted to do some circuit/cardio work with me one of the days (when we were planning to meet 3 times), but I’m hoping now that it’s down to two sessions that he’ll just do arms/chest one day and legs the other,  along with core and leave the cardio to me on my own.  In fact, I’m going to do more than hope, I’m going to tell him that’s what I want to do.  After all, I’m paying for the sessions.

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My new meal plan is going really well.  I’ve been able to stay within my calories really easily and there are two side bonuses:

1. I’m going to save money! I only spent $60 for all my food this week, which translates to $240 for the month, which is so much less than I was spending ($400).
2. I’m saving so much time! I sort of new this would happen, but it’s not just saving me in the nightly cooking, it’s also so much easier to pack up my breakfasts/lunches – just grab and go.  No prep at all.  It’s sort of nice.

I haven’t figured out what I’m going to cook this weekend yet.  Whatever it is, it’s going to be something for one, because I don’t want too many leftovers that I have to deal with. Although if I do make some sort of stew or baked pasta dish, I could theoretically portion it carefully and have it for lunch and dinner a couple times next week.  We’ll see.

If you have any one-person meal ideas that actually involve some cooking, I’d love to hear them.

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I LOVE November because there are so many holidays (no work days).  Which shouldn’t  give you the impression that I don’t love my job, because I do, but I’ve learned over the last couple of years especially that BALANCE is important and that I enjoy my life more than I enjoy my job.  Next week I get Thursday and Friday off for Veteran’s Day – hello 4-day weekend! Then 2 weeks later I get Wednesday, Thursday, Friday off for Thanksgiving (5-day weekend!!). Plus, once the weather turns cold and daylight savings time hits, everything just feels a bit more cozy.

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That’s it for me today.  I hope you are having a great Thursday.

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Feeling Lucky!

Back when I was a sophomore in high school, it was Friday the 13th, and I will never forget my Spanish teacher telling us:

This whole Friday the 13th being unlucky is an American thing.  I mean, how can a Friday be unlucky?  It’s a FRIDAY!  In Spain, Tuesday the 13th might be unlucky, but never a Friday.”

And from that day forward, I decided that because everyone else always thought of 13 as such an unlucky number, it was going to become my favorite number.  You see, I like being “avant garde” like that.  And I completely agree with Mr. Hernandez, how can a Friday ever be a bad day?

So today’s post is going to be all about how lucky I’m feeling.  (Quite a switch from yesterday’s debbie downer post, right?):

I have amazing family and friends, and I get to see them all the time. Tomorrow LC and I are going to a Zumba class together in the morning, and then we’re going to spend the day with my nieces and my dad, swimming and having fun.  I can think of no better way to spend a Saturday.

I’ve made some great “reconnections” with high school chums via Facebook, and I even head up an Alumnae Food & Wine Club.  A core group of us have become really close, and we do things outside of the club.  Last night I went to karaoke with a few of them, and we had a great time, although none of us got up the nerve (or had enough drinks) to get up in front of the crowd and actually sing.  We made a vow that next time, we’ll be up there crooning our hearts out.

I am finally in the place in my career where I’m making good money.  Now this is relative, of course, because I am a teacher and we don’t get paid what we deserve, but I’ve finally scaled my way up the pay scale so that I am living comfortably.  In these times of economic hardship for so many, I am very, very lucky.

This summer has been amazing, and while I’m sad that it’s coming to a close, I’ve had an absolute blast for 2 months.  Sure, there are a lot of things I didn’t get the chance to do, but that’s what weekends are for, right?

Lulu is a love, and I am so glad she’s in my life.  Having her has given me more purpose in my life, because now I’m not so concentrated on just myself; I have someone else to focus on, and it was just what I needed. Yesterday I found out about a great new book called A Dog’s Purpose, and I think the concept is really cool: ” [it] proposes that a dog’s purpose might entail being reborn several times.”  I’ve put it on my “To Read” list.

I’ve shown myself this week how strong I really am.  I have always considered myself a strong woman, and have lots of evidence to prove that to be true, but this week I’ve put myself to the test by quitting smoking AND starting a 1200-calorie meal plan.  No easy feat (again, as evidenced by yesterday’s post).  As of today I am 3 days smoke free, and this is getting to be a bit easier with each passing hour.  Once I finish today, it will be the longest I’ve ever gone without smoking since I started 15 years ago, and that feels amazing.

I have taken myself out of the dating scene for the past few years, but last night I started talking to two of my girlfriends who met great, handsome, loving men on Match.com.  That’s the one dating site that I’ve never used, which is weird, because it’s the biggest.  I always perceived it to be more of a meat market, but these two girls met wonderful men on there, and they both happen to be plus-sized ladies.  So it kind of gave me some hope that maybe I too, could find someone on there.  I thinking I’m going to wait a few months, because so much is already going on in my life, but this might be a fun thing.  (Last night one of the girls had one of her guy friends join us after we had been there a few hours.  Apparently, he’s looking to meet a girlfriend, and she thought that he and I would be a good fit.  (This was all unbeknownst to me).  He was a good looking guy who seemed very sweet, but there was no love connection on my part.  Still, it did give me a little thrill to hear this morning that he wants to ask me out on a date.  I told her I didn’t think we were a match, because I always go with my gut feeling in matters of love, but it was still nice to think that someone found me attractive).

There are so many opportunities waiting right around the corner for me.  A new place to live (fingers crossed), a new body, and maybe, eventually a new love.

Tonight I’m going to see Eat Pray Love with a good friend, and I’m really looking forward to it.  I read and loved the book, and I’m hoping the film is a good adaptation.  From the previews I’ve seen, the settings look amazing, and with Julia Roberts and Javier Bardem, it will be good eye-candy, so I’m sure I’ll enjoy it.

How are you spending this Friday the 13th?

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