Posts Tagged ‘dating’

Let me start by saying that I’m not sure if I’ve ever been more excited to write a post since I started this blog 7 1/2¬†years ago. ¬†Longtime readers know that this blog has mainly focused on my weight loss and healthy living journey. ¬†You’ve been with me through the struggles, the striving, and the successes. ¬†But one of the underlying dreams I’ve had for years, one that I wrote a lot about on my original¬†blog, was¬†to have a romantic relationship.

When I was at my heaviest weight, feeling insecure about how I looked and feeling like my¬†outside didn’t match the inside, I just gave up on dating. ¬†I wasn’t meeting quality people; actually they were just the opposite of that. I decided that if this guy wasn’t someone I’d date when I was at my goal weight, why would I settle and date him now? ¬†On the one hand, it was empowering to know that I was worth more than hanging out with some random guy. ¬†On the other hand, my lack of a dating life was an area that left me with such longing. ¬†Not one to dwell on the negative, I pushed past any thoughts of “I wish I had a boyfriend…” and just focused all of my energy on myself and losing weight. ¬†That tactic paid off, and I couldn’t be happier with the results of all of my hard work.

In the back of my head I thought that once I lost all the weight, I’d be able to meet a really great guy and finally start that part of my life again. ¬†Little did I know how difficult it would be to find someone even at a normal weight. ¬†Lots of bad dates with odd ducks, dates with guys who weren’t into me, good dates with people I thought had potential, but didn’t end up working out. ¬†I’ve written quite a bit about how frustrating the whole thing was, and I took another break at the end of the summer last year.

At the beginning of May, my friend encouraged me to join Zoosk, which is an online dating site that I hadn’t heard of before. ¬†After kissing a lot of frogs, she had found a great guy and she wanted me to give it a shot, too. ¬†So I went on the site, uploaded my photos, wrote a bit about myself and crossed my fingers. ¬†I got a lot of attention from all sorts of men, and sifting through everyone was a bit overwhelming. Lots of chatting, texting, talking on the phone, and even one date that was pretty humbling. ¬†(I thought we’d had a pretty decent date, albeit not a lot of chemistry, but when I texted to thank him for the dinner, he just disappeared). ¬†Online dating makes people think it’s ok to be rude – ugh.

Through all of this, there was one guy that had completely intrigued¬†me. ¬†RC3 had such a sincere profile, was a complete doll, was my same age, had a passion for photography and art, and didn’t have kids. ¬†He was like an online dating unicorn!! ¬†We texted back and forth for a few days, and then started talking on the phone. ¬†As soon as we were on that first phone call, I knew that we had chemistry and wanted to get to know him even better. ¬†The one downside was that we lived about 30 miles from each other and had completely opposite work schedules. ¬†When I mentioned that this might pose a problem, his reply was, “these are easy obstacles to overcome.” ¬†That positive attitude put a smile on my face, and made me take even more notice of him.

He asked me out for that Saturday, May 16th. ¬†We were meeting at Santana Row, a great spot near my house with lots of stores, restaurants, and bars. It was ideal because we could walk around and see where we felt like going. ¬†Plus, it’s really beautiful. ¬†I’d decided to go to Dry Bar to get a blowout so that I was looking my best, but of course the stylist was 30 minutes late. Not the best way to start out a date – worried and running behind. ¬†RC3 was super cool about it when I texted him, telling me to take my time and not worry about it. ¬†That put me at ease, and showed me that he was a really flexible, patient person.

Our meeting spot allowed me to scope him out a bit as I walked up to him, before he saw me. ¬†I knew he was tall (6’3″) and good looking, but when I walked up and saw him, the word that popped in my head was¬†“whoa!” ¬†He was even better in person than in his profile.¬†¬†(A rarity that only those who have been on a date with someone whose profile picture is 10+ years old can understand). ¬†He has the warmest eyes and the sweetest smile, and he seemed really happy to see me, too. ¬†He complimented my hair, and I said, “well, you have to say that after making you wait!” It broke the ice, although I had a nervous excitement that I couldn’t shake. But I knew he liked what he saw, and that gave me the best confidence boost.

Our first date was really awesome – we had a great dinner, walked around looking at all the shops, talked easily, had drinks at a pretty outside bar, and just clicked. ¬†The chemistry was so strong that when we were sitting outside at the bar I did something that I never do – I leaned over and kissed him! Such a huge risk (especially for a girl who doesn’t like to make the first move with guys) but it paid off, because he kissed me right back, and we shared an amazing first kiss. ¬†He confessed that he’d been wanting to kiss me for awhile, but wanted to be a gentleman. ¬†So sweet! ¬†As he walked me back to my car later in the evening, we even took a selfie to commemorate the date. ¬†I can’t tell you how cool it was that he didn’t mind taking photos like that, since I drive my family and friends crazy with how often my camera is out to capture memories. ¬†(Although that makes sense, since he is a photographer).

We hung out the next evening, where I drove up to his area and he showed me all around. ¬†More selfies, more kisses, more laughs, more butterflies, and more getting to know each other. ¬†We have so many things in common – love the same kind of music, enjoy the same types of tv shows and movies, have cultures that value family and food, and are both honest, sincere people. I can trust him and he knows he can trust me, too. ¬†He likes that I’m a strong woman, thinks my “spiciness” is sexy, and just gets me. I can’t tell you how exceptional that is, because my personality is definitely not for everyone.¬†I like¬†that he’s such a gentleman who opens doors for me (every single time we get in the car, he opens the door for me, which I love), has such a giving heart, and has an artsy side that completely captivates me.

Every time we see each other, we get closer and closer. We have the best time when we’re together, whether we’re eating a great restaurant or strolling the aisles at Target. ¬†It’s so fun showing each other around our cities and making new discoveries together. ¬†Things are so easy between us – we just have an ebb and flow that works perfectly together¬†– he’s the calm to my excited, he’s patient when I’m impatient. We are both passionate people, although we display it in different ways. ¬†We just fit. ¬†And I feel absolutely lucky and so grateful that he found me on Zoosk.

If you can’t tell by now, sparks are flying!

Things are moving quickly, and while we’re being realistic, we both agreed to just go with the flow and not worry about timelines. ¬†We’re at the age where we’ve been hurt, know what we want, what we don’t want, and what we need from another person. ¬†So to me, if things move at a faster pace, it makes sense, because we’ve already done the hard work of wading through a lot of the B.S. that comes with dating. ¬†We’ve had lots of serious conversations about our pasts, shared things that we haven’t told very many people, and understand how where we’ve come from makes us the people we are today. We’ve allowed each other to be vulnerable with the other, taking the risk that comes with opening up. Those late night chats have allowed us to take the leap of faith that comes with commitment. ¬†With that said, I’m happy to announce¬†that RC3 is my boyfriend!!!

My boyfriend?! ¬†I haven’t used those two words together in longer than I’d like to admit. ¬†Which makes it all the more special.

And remember all of those fears I had about getting intimate with someone? ¬†The worry that once the person saw me without my clothes on, things would be awkward, weird, or otherwise terrible? ¬†Not at all the case with RC3. Quite the opposite, actually.¬†He makes me feel absolutely beautiful, flaws and all, because he doesn’t just see the outside, but connects with me on a much deeper level. ¬†It’s awesome when he compliments me on how pretty he thinks my eyes are, or how he likes my curves, or how cool my hair is, but it’s even more amazing when he looks at me and I know he’s seeing my soul.

I am beyond thrilled that summer is literally two¬†days away and we have so many fun adventures ahead of us. ¬†We’ve already made so many plans about places we want to go and things we want to see. ¬†We’ve already spent many fantastic days together – walking along Jack London Square, popping into old bookstores, discovering a bike shop with the coolest cruisers, getting together with Tinkerbell and her hubby to watch the Warriors win, riding the roller coasters in Santa Cruz, hearing a great singer (Eilen Jewell) at a local jazz spot, and just looking at the moon while we’re on the phone together.

I can honestly say that I haven’t felt like this in years. ¬†When we’re together, I feel like I’m in my 20s, and not just because we both look young for our ages. ¬†But because I haven’t experienced something like this since that time. ¬†Actually, I haven’t really ever experienced something like this. I wasn’t ready for it then, but I am now. The connection I thought I’d made with people in the recent past pale in comparison to the connection that RC3 and I are forging. ¬†I love how attentive he is – texting and calling me even when he’s on a weekend boys’ trip and his friends give him a bad time for contacting me so much. ¬†Bringing me coffee from a great coffeehouse in Portland because he knows how much I like a good, dark roast. Sending me photos of his day. Letting me borrow his favorite art books. Listening to the songs that he knows I love. Just checking in to see how my day is going. We click on so many levels – artistically, emotionally, physically, and mentally. ¬†It’s exciting and never fails to take my breath away. ¬†You can see it in the Instagram photos¬†I’ve posted. I’m completely smitten, and RC3 shows me in lots of little ways that the same is true for him.

I’m definitely falling…

…and it was completely worth the wait.


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I have quite a few updates to cover, so let’s dig right in, shall we?


I’m actually glad I waited to update this, because I was confused for about a week or so, and then as it usually happens, things clarified themselves pretty quickly.

Let’s start with TR.¬† Technically, we’re not dating, since we were getting together for dinner “as friends.”¬† Still, it had been a few months since we’d seen each other, and I was a bit nervous about how it would go. It was nice that TR had asked me to bring Sofi, because the dogs automatically eased whatever awkwardness there would have been.¬† Both dogs love playing together, something that TR commented on a few times that evening.¬† He’d prepared a really special dinner for me: grilled Italian sausage, risotto made from scratch, grilled onions & bell peppers, and a beautiful salad with artichoke hearts, chopped olives, tomatoes, and a yummy vinaigrette. We also had some really great red wine.¬† The fact that he put in so much effort to make such a lovely dinner really made me feel special.¬† We enjoyed the food, took a long walk after dinner with the dogs, and then came back and watched a bit of TV.¬† Things definitely stayed at the friend level, but being around him reminded me of how much I enjoyed hanging out with him.¬† We have so many things in common – our Italian heritage, our love of local sports teams, cooking/eating great food, and our dogs.¬† He’s classy, fun, and there’s just something there.¬† On my part.¬† And maybe on his too, because he mentioned that he never got my recipe for pesto when I cooked for him in the summer, to which I replied, “so are you saying you’d like a live demonstration?” He said he did.¬† So we have plans for him and his pup to come over soon so I can make pesto for him and he can copy down the recipe.¬† (Or maybe it’s just an excuse for us to hang out again?). One of my friends asked me why I’m still hanging out with him, because if I had my way, we’d still be dating, and he says that he doesn’t want to since I don’t want to have kids and he does.¬† She thinks I’m setting myself up for disappointment, and that it must be so difficult.¬† I told her that I really do like spending time with him, and that if I’m honest, I am hoping that somehow he changes his mind and decides that he’d like to start dating again at some point.¬† And besides, it’s not like I’m not dating other people and pinning all my romantic hopes on him. But I do see her point, and maybe I’ll eventually feel like the situation is too frustrating.

Moving on to the sheriff…he came over two weeks ago and we hung out watching Sunday Night Football and getting a little more physical (I’ll spare the details, nothing too serious happened). One good thing is that my worries about the way my body looks weren’t an issue that night at all.¬† I’ve come to realize that if I’m with the right person, someone who makes me feel like he adores me, the issues I have with my body won’t really come into play.¬† The evening left me very confused because I just wasn’t physically attracted to sheriff, and I’m not talking about anything that happened when we were making out, but more in just how he looks in general.¬† I know that sounds pretty shallow, but attraction is important.¬† So I began the week not knowing what I was going to do, if I wanted to continue seeing him, or if I should cut it off.¬† We were texting everyday, but I was moving more toward letting him go.¬† And then this past Tuesday, when the Ferguson verdict came out, he texted me some photos that were in very poor taste, bordering on racist.¬† We hadn’t even said hello or good morning, and he was sending me photos about the looting and rioting that were really disgusting.¬† Not that I condone looting and rioting, but I know he was doing it to see if he could get me going. I didn’t reply to the first photo, because he’d sent it in a group text, but after the second photo came through to just me, I had to respond:

Me: not funny

Sheriff: I think it’s hilarious

Me: that’s the crux of the problem

Sheriff: (I won’t repeat his response, but he went into this whole diatribe about how the liberal media was making it about race, when it clearly wasn’t about race)

WTF? Is he serious right now?  This was just too much for me.

Me: Listen, I don’t want to debate this with you. Those pictures you sent me were in poor taste and showed a side of yourself that I don’t want to get to know better.

And that was that.¬† Problem solved.¬† Confusion over.¬† No response, and we’re done.¬† And to be honest with you, I haven’t given him a second thought since.¬† I knew that dating someone who holds such different ideologies from me wouldn’t work.¬† At first I thought his views were more moderate, but those photos and his subsequent response showed that he and I hold much different views on race, justice, etc.¬† So it’s time to move on.¬† And before you think I’ve made these decisions because of TR, I didn’t.¬† The confusion with the sheriff started before I went over to TR’s for dinner, although after the dinner I did feel like the connection I feel with TR was lacking with the sheriff.

At the moment there are no other people on eHarmony that I’m interested in, but I get new matches daily, so who knows.¬† Plus, I’m actually hoping to just meet someone when I’m out and about.¬† There’s no rush, and I don’t feel any pressure to “get a boyfriend,” so I’m just going to stay open and see who comes my way.


These past couple of months my weight has been at a standstill.¬† Mostly because I haven’t been putting as much effort into working out and eating as I should have been.¬† I haven’t been going wild with food, and I have been getting in workouts a few times a week, but I’ve basically been in maintenance mode. Which actually makes me happy to know that I can successfully maintain my weight…when the time comes.¬† But that time isn’t here yet.¬† I have 20 pounds or so to lose, and I’m determined to get back on the losing track.

I know lots of people would look at the calendar, see the holiday season coming, and say, just get back to it in January.¬† But that’s not me.¬† Why let a whole month go by without working towards my goals?¬† After all, I’m not that into sweets, so holiday treats don’t tempt me, and Christmas Eve and Christmas Day are just two days, two meals, really.¬† So there’s no reason not to start back tomorrow, December 1st.

As luck would have it, I was on Instagram the other day when I saw that Fit Girls Worldwide posted about a Winter Wonderland 28-Day Challenge that was beginning December 1st.  So I decided to buy their guide and join in on it.

The meal plan is fairly simple, full of well-balanced meals that are pretty easy to make.¬† The guide comes with a shopping list for the week, which makes it very convenient.¬† Because the meal plan is all about eating clean, healthy food, it does require meal prep.¬† Luckily I don’t mind cooking, and I love that the guide gives tips on how when to prep which meals, which makes it very organized.¬† I am going to have to modify the portions, but other than that, the meal plan looks good.¬† At first I was put off a bit that there are only two different dinner ideas for the week, because I am all about variety. Then I realized that the meal guide is perfectly planned so that it uses up all the food on the shopping list for the week, and I know that I normally throw out extra food that I can’t eat when I cook too many different dinners. So sacrificing a bit of¬† variety for less food waste is something I’m willing to try.¬† The plan doesn’t include as much protein at each meal as I’m used to having, but I’m willing to give it a shot for 28 days to see how it works.

Making December Spectacular

My goal for this week is to be active each day, include 5 TIU workouts, stick to this new food plan, and check in a lot on Instagram.¬† I’m looking forward to starting the last month of the year tomorrow with a renewed energy and a great plan.¬† I’m motivated and excited!

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It’s been quite an eventful weekend, so I thought I’d do a wrap-up post to catch you guys up.


This Halloween was quite eventful for me. ¬†Not only did I go as Vampira on the Halloween boat cruise last Friday (10/25), but I wore two different costumes on the 31st. ¬†I wore a cozy, comfy Eeyore costume to work on Friday because the other teachers who work at the district office with me decided we should go as animals. ¬†I didn’t have a costume idea in mind at all, so luckily my mentoring partner had the Eeyore costume and let me borrow it. ¬†It definitely wasn’t the most flattering thing ever, but since the day was rainy and cold, it was pretty perfect. ¬†When we stepped out to get some goodies for a Halloween lunch we were having later that day, so many people at the grocery store came up and told us how cute we looked (she was wearing a similar giraffe costume).

photo 1

I was heading to Tinkerbell’s house on Friday night for a passing out candy Halloween party. ¬†I knew I wanted to be comfortable, so the Vampira costume was out; but I also wanted to look pretty, so the Eeyore outfit was out too. ¬†I found the perfect thing on Amazon – a Wonder Woman tshirt, complete with cape and headband. ¬†I decided to put the false eyelashes I wore for Vampira on, too, and I loved the way it looked:

closeup of the makeup

closeup of the makeup

photo 3

I had a great time that night, passing out candy to the tons of kids who showed up at Tinkerbell’s house, spending time with her family and friends, and just enjoying ¬†the evening. One of the best parts of the night was that so many people told me how thin I looked. ¬†People that had seen me just a few weeks ago asked how much more weight I’d lost. I’ve actually stayed the same for the past couple of months, although I do know I’ve lost inches. I also think it was the new (size 10!!) jeans. ¬†It always feels awesome to get complimented about weight loss and looking healthier.


Thanks for everyone’s positive and encouraging comments about my date with Fireman. ¬†We had a great night, but throughout the week I hadn’t heard too much from him. ¬†The week before he was really attentive via texts and calls, and I knew this week he was on vacation (although he was staying home), so I wasn’t sure if he was just extra ¬†busy. ¬†I heard from him almost everyday, but his texts didn’t have the same flirtation that they had the week before. ¬†And I just knew that something was off, and that probably he’d lost interest. ¬†So finally yesterday I just texted him and asked, and he responded with the fact that he had a great time on our first date, and that he thinks I’m beautiful, BUT (I knew there was a but coming), he just didn’t feel a love ¬†connection and didn’t think he could commit to a second date. ¬†I was disappointed, but since I had the feeling that’s what was going on, I wasn’t surprised. ¬†It’s not so much the fact that this particular guy wasn’t interested, but more the fact that I seem to be so unlucky in love. ¬†I really don’t know what it is. ¬†I know my bold personality isn’t for everyone, but there has to be SOMEone out there who would appreciate it. ¬†As luck would have it, last night seemed to be a busy night for me on eHarmony, with several matches contacting me and wanting to move through the question process. ¬†So, we’ll see. ¬†I’m not going to get overly excited, but I’m going to keep an open mind. Sometimes it’s hard not to lose hope and get depressed, but I’m not into dwelling in that headspace for too long. ¬†I like to look on the brighter side of life, so that’s what I’m going to do.

 November Goals

photo (1)

  • Blog 2-3 times a week, comment on blogs on the days I write
  • Exercise: cardio 6 days a week, toning at least 3 days
  • Continue eating healthy
  • Log food/exercise in MyFitnessPal daily
  • Read 30 minutes a day
  • Run the entire Turkey Trot 5K
  • Go on dates

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(I’m not so sure about the staying up late…yet)

As you guys know, I signed up for Match.com at the beginning of December.  Up to this point, there have been quite a few guys who have winked, liked photos, and even emailed me, but very few who truly sparked my interest.  And of those, fewer still whose attention I seemed to hold for longer than the time it took them to contact me.

What is it with guys who contact you, wink at you, and “like” every photo you have on your profile, only to disappear after you email them back?¬† It’s just as well,¬† I don’t need someone who’s not able to give me his attention for more than a day. I’m sure it just wasn’t meant to be.¬† Oh, and to the guy who sent me the note asking, “is it true what they day about not trusting a big butt and a smile?” all I had to say to him was…REALLY?! (Oh, I have some doozies I could share, but maybe that’s for another post).

There have been a couple of guys who I’ve communicated with back and forth on Match.com email, and I found them to be intriguing enough to consider meeting up for coffee/drinks.¬† So I waited, answered their emails, and waited some more.

And then I decided to do something I would normally never do – I decided to suggest that we meet up for coffee.¬† Now I now this will probably surprise those of you who know me in real life or even through this blog.¬† I’m so bold, so confident, so strong – why would making the first move be weird for me?¬† Because I am a traditional girl when it comes to dating.¬† I like the guy to make the first move; that way I know he’s really into me, and isn’t just being nice.¬† But I threw caution to the wind and sent this message to the two guys I was interested in:

I hope you’ve had a great new year’s so far. Mine has been really nice. I love how the beginning of a new year is so full of possibility & promise.

With that said, I’m going to go way outside my comfort zone and ask if you’d like to meet up sometime for coffee. I’m interested in getting to know you better, and I think there’s only so much you can learn online. My number is xxx-xxx-xxxx if you’d like to text/call me and set something up.

And you know what?¬† It worked!¬† One of the guys, whom I’ll refer to as CannoliD (because he has a great photo of himself eating a cannoli in Rome on his profile)¬† responded the very next day, and we’re going to go to coffee late next week.¬† We haven’t set up the specific date yet because he’s not feeling well, but I think it will be on Saturday.

How fun!¬† I’m not going into this with any expectations, other than to get to know him better.¬† The small amount I do know from CannoliD’s profile and our emails are all things that I really like:

  • 40 years old
  • no kids
  • has a professional job
  • has a college degree, in fact, he attended my same college
  • is from my city
  • owns his own home
  • is Italian!
  • is a dog owner (he also has a cat, but I’m not going to hold that against him. Have I ever mentioned my huge fear of cats?¬† They FREAK me out! Don’t judge, some people are scared of little, tiny spiders)
  • has the sweetest smile
  • seems like a genuinely nice guy

I don’t want to make too much of this because who knows if there will even be a second date, but I will say that I’m looking forward to it.¬† If for no other reason than that it’s been 5 years (has it REALLY been that long?!) since I’ve been on a date, and I’m ready to get back out there and see what happens.

Wish me luck!

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reverb13-blog-button Throughout the month of December, I’ll be participating in #reverb13: Reverb is a way to reflect on the past year and project into the next year with a prompt a day for 31 days.¬† December is the perfect time to reflect on 2013 and start to create intentions for 2014.

Day 30: Relationships

Relationships | Did you find a new best friend?  Delve deeper into a relationship?  Break up?  Get back together?  Tell us about who you added Рor subtracted Рfrom your life.  Why?

My friendships are so important to me, and I try to nurture them as much as possible.¬† Now that we’re in our 40s and busy with jobs, families, and other obligations, getting together is a lot more challenging.¬† Still, I try to make sure I get together with each of my friends (and sometimes a few of them at once) for coffee or something at least once a month.¬† Most of my friends are girls I’ve known since high school, and it’s really fantastic to know people that long.¬† These are tried-and-true friends.¬† Ride or die chicks.¬† Girls who have seen me through everything, and me them. We’ll always be in each other’s lives.¬† One major goal I have in 2014, which I started at the end of 2013 is to get together with them much more often.¬† To do things together, not just coffee and convo, but getting out and about and doing fun things, too.

One friendship that has blossomed in 2013 is with Tinkerbell.¬† She and I really started to hang out at the very beginning of January 2013, and our friendship has grown so much over the course of this year.¬† We have so much in common, including both getting the VSG. It’s fantastic having someone in real life to discuss all the issues that come up with having had weight loss surgery.¬† But beyond that, we have similar values, live in the same neighborhood (within 5 minutes driving), and like to do the same things. Tinkerbell is incredible supportive, so generous, and absolutely inspiring.¬† Whenever I see her post about her long runs on MyFitnessPal, I get motivated to do my walk/run intervals.¬† We have a great time shopping, getting our hair blown out, and delving into more serious topics, too.¬† I’m so grateful that we’ve become so close, and consider her one of my best friends.

A few of my most cherished friends are women who have moved far from me, but the distance doesn’t inhibit our friendship because of this great age of technology.¬† It’s not quite the same as being in the same room, but being able to check in on Facebook share our daily smiles through photos and statuses helps us stay connected.¬† Plus, with things like Facetime and texting, we can keep up with each other as if we did live in the same city.

And then there are the blogging buddies, pals on MFP, and WLS peeps on YouTube and FB¬† who have offered me so much support, encouragement, and happiness that they are definitely people I count among my friends, even though we’ve never met.¬† I am so thankful to have them in my lives.

In terms of romantic relationships, I recently signed up for Match.com, and while I find the entire process terribly slow, it has given me a bit of a boost to know that some of these men find me attractive enough to email, wink at, or contact.¬† I haven’t dated in years, and now that I’ve put myself back out there, I’m really hoping that 2014 brings me some fun dates (or maybe something even more serious) in the love department.


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Happy Monday! It’s been a few weeks since I’ve been able to write up an FMM post, and I’m really looking forward to participating.¬† This weekend was a fun one – I went to a Beauty Trend Show at Nordstrom on Saturday and treated myself to a couple of products as a reward for losing 90 pounds.¬† Sunday I spent the day with family, watching my 49ers lose, and saying goodbye to Dexter as I watched the series finale.

But let’s get to this week’s Friend Makin’ Monday. I’m really interested in this week’s topic because after years of taking myself off the market when it comes to dating, I think I *may* finally be ready to dip my toe in the pond.¬† My friends keep encouraging me to join an online dating site, and I think I may do it next month.¬† (One of my goals for the year was to join an online dating site before the end of November, so this would be a bit ahead of schedule).

If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section at: www.alltheweigh.com so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!


FMM: Relationships and Dating

1.  List five characteristics that you think are important in a significant other.

  1. Attraction – It’s not all about looks, but I do think being physically attracted to someone is a big factor.
  2. Intelligence – He’s got to match me, otherwise I’ll be bored.
  3. Financial Security – I want my guy to at least make what I do, which isn’t too difficult, considering the paltry sum I get paid to teach.
  4. Ambition – I’m very ambitious, both with my career and in the goals I’ve set for myself, and it would be better if my guy was of a similar mindset.
  5. Fun – It’s really important that we can have a good time together.¬† Our idea of how we like to spend leisure time should match up.

2. ¬†If you had to choose between staying single for the next two years (as in, no dating at all,) or receiving $10,000, which would you choose?¬† At first I thought I’d take the money, but $10,000 isn’t enough to for two years.¬† If it was $50K or more, I’d probably choose the money. I’m used to being single (I haven’t dated in 4 years), and I can always use more money.

3. ¬†What is your relationship status? ¬†Are you satisfied with it?¬† I’m single and have been for longer than I can remember.¬† Even when I was dating over 4 years ago, it wasn’t really a “significant other” situation.¬† So, I guess I’d say I’m very comfortable with the life I’ve created, but having someone romantic in my life would be a nice addition.

4. ¬†Would you date someone who has children?¬† Since I’ve made the decision not to have children, I’d prefer if the guy I’m dating doesn’t have children living with him.¬† Or has children who are older – late teens.

5. ¬†Would you date someone who‚Äôs shorter than you?¬† No.¬† I’m 5″3′ and I don’t want to date someone who’s less than 5″9′ in his socks.¬† I like taller guys.

6. ¬†Would you date someone who has different political views?¬† No, I’d find it difficult to date someone who’s core beliefs were vastly different from my own.

7.  If you were going on vacation together, would you choose the beach or the mountains?  It really depends.  I think both venues could be really romantic.  I love the beach (obvi Рblog title and all), but cozying up in a mountain cabin could be really fun, too.

8. ¬†How do you show someone that you‚Äôre interested in them?¬† Flirting?¬† It’s been so long I’m wayyyyy out of practice.¬† I think in person, it’s all about eye contact.

9. ¬†Do you prefer to date people who are older than you or younger?¬† It really doesn’t matter. I think I’m young at heart, so I could date younger very easily.¬† But as long as the person had the characteristics I’m looking for, older would be fine, too.

10.  Share some details of your dream date. A dream date would be anything the guy put effort into planning.  I have lots of interests and can enjoy all sorts of venues, so something that meant he was thinking of me as he figured it out would mean a lot and really impress me.

Now it‚Äôs your turn to answer the questions!¬†¬† And also be sure to go back to Kenlie’s blog and leave a link to your FMM post in the comments!¬† I really encourage you to comment on as many people’s posts as you can – I’ve met some fantastic people through FMM.¬† You never know who you’ll meet today.

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