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Posts Tagged ‘determination’

2014-02-02 09.10.57

February – love is in the air, and this month is going to be all about loving myself enough to continue making 2014 my year to shine. I’m vowing here and now that I will reach my goal weight in 2014. What an amazing accomplishment it will be! To achieve my goals, I’m going to focus on the basics – eating well, drinking lots of water, taking my vitamins and getting in 5 cardio workouts a week. I’ve started strength training with #ToneItUp and their #LoveYourBody series is helping see just how strong I am as I change my body. Sunday weigh-ins will keep me accountable through the weekend. This month is going to be all about loving all the little things that make life special. My Sunday progress updates will be called Fabulous February Weigh-Ins.

Week 39 was nothing short of amazing!  I had the entire week off, got to spend time with a few different friends, planned to try a bunch of new fitness classes at the gym, like Spin and Zumba Step, and it was also my 9-month surgiversary.

So, what did the scale show?!

When I weighed in this morning, I was 189.6, which is a loss of 4.2 pounds this week, and a loss of 87.4 lbs since surgery! I’ve lost a total of 125.4 pounds from my highest weight!! I have 39.6 pounds to go to my ultimate goal weight of 150 pounds. What an amazing week!!  I’m in the 180s!!!!!  I haven’t seen a loss this big in quite some time, and I can only attribute it to the fact that I didn’t have any stress, could spend the days working out and drinking plenty of water, and cooked delicious, healthy meals for myself.

This week someone told me I was lucky to have lost so much weight since surgery.  I responded that luck had nothing to do with it, that it was a lot of hard work.  And it has been.  I haven’t just sat back and let the weight loss happen.  I’ve put in the effort of planning, shopping, cooking, and logging each meal.  I’ve spent the time in the gym, on the track, and on the hybrid.  I’ve chosen to make the most out of these first 9 months after surgery because I know it’s when the maximum weight loss happens.  I’ve changed my life.  And that has made all the difference. That’s why I know I’ll reach every single goal I set for myself.

I had a lot of time this week off to celebrate my successes.  I was able to write lots of blog posts, and reflecting like that really helps me put things into perspective.  I am in completely new territory in terms of my weight, and I don’t want to forget any of these moments.  For so long I dreamed of arriving at this moment, and I don’t want to take a second of it for granted.

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Until next Sunday, my friends. I hope the scale treats you well, and that you have a wonderful week!

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2014-02-02 09.10.57

February – love is in the air, and this month is going to be all about loving myself enough to continue making 2014 my year to shine. I’m vowing here and now that I will reach my goal weight in 2014. What an amazing accomplishment it will be! To achieve my goals, I’m going to focus on the basics – eating well, drinking lots of water, taking my vitamins and getting in 5 cardio workouts a week. I’ve started strength training with #ToneItUp and their #LoveYourBody series is helping see just how strong I am as I change my body. Sunday weigh-ins will keep me accountable through the weekend. This month is going to be all about loving all the little things that make life special. My Sunday progress updates will be called Fabulous February Weigh-Ins.

Week 38 was stressful and challenging, but I’m happy to say I made it through better off than I began.  It wasn’t a terrible week, just one where everything seemed to be running at a fever-pitch.  I did get my workouts in, and I’m noticing some great changes in my body.

So, what did the scale show?!

When I weighed in this morning, I was 193.8, which is a loss of 0.8 pounds this week, and a loss of 83.2 lbs since surgery! I’ve lost a total of 121.2 pounds from my highest weight!! I have 43.8 pounds to go to my ultimate goal weight of 150 pounds. I’m really thankful for a loss this week, because of my poor choices on Friday.  Let’s be honest, it was one meal, and I still stayed under my calories for the day.  I made good choices the rest of the time, but with the challenges of the week, I’m happy to see a loss at all.  Plus, last week I had a big loss, and that’s usually followed by a smaller one.

One of the things that struck me this week were the changes I’m noticing in my body.  When I’m laying flat on my back about to do some ab work, I can really see and feel my ribs, and my hip bones are becoming apparent.  When I look at myself from a side-view standing at the mirror, I can see the start of definition in my stomach, and I’m definitely seeing a very slim profile. All of these changes are the result of my weight loss, sure, but I do think it’s because of the toning I’ve been doing with the #ToneItUp program.  I started four weeks ago, and I really wish I would’ve taken measurements at that time, but I didn’t.  Today the ToneItUp trainers will be sending a new set of workouts to get ready for spring, and I’m going to make sure to take measurements and photos for comparison at the end of the 6-week plan.

On a side note, I’m really upset that I haven’t been taking measurements all along since my surgery.  I meant to, but one thing or another would distract me and then I never did.  I do have some measurements from way back pre-op, March 2012, when I weighed 297 lbs or so. I just went back on this blog and I noticed that I wasn’t weighing in regularly at that time, probably because I was having such a hard time losing weight and regular weigh-ins were stressing me out.  Plus, there was more than a bit of denial there – if I  wasn’t seeing that the scale wasn’t moving, I wasn’t having to admit to my failings.  Regardless, when I take my measurements later today, I’m going to do a major comparison just for fun. My plan is to start taking measurements every Sunday, along with progress photos, so that I can start recording the changes in my body, and post about the progress once a month or so.

This week I have the entire week off, and since I didn’t end up going to Tahoe (I decided to save the money I would’ve spent and put it towards my Hawaiian vacation in April), I’m going to spend the week trying out a bunch of fitness classes that I can’t normally attend.  Here’s my cardio plan for the week (I’ll add in the toning once I get the week of workouts from ToneItUp):

  • Sunday: Run/walk with Di. She and I have been meeting up every Sunday morning, and I really look forward to this time to catch up and then get our sweat on.
  • Monday: Pilates. I tried Pilates a long time ago, and liked it for the first 10 minutes, but my almost-300 pound frame just couldn’t do most of the moves, so I left the class early. I can’t wait to see how much more I’m able to do now.
  • Tuesday: Spin. This is the class I’ve been dying to try, but was also completely intimidated at the same time.  Not because I didn’t think I could keep up, because even at my heaviest weight, I had so much strength in my legs/thighs, but because of my girth and the close proximity of the bikes to one another in the spin room.  The bikes are literally on top of each other, and when I was at my heaviest, I felt like I’d be overflowing into my neighbor’s space, and that just wasn’t something I wanted to deal with.  So I’ve avoided the class for all this time.  I have a feeling I’m going to love spin and it’s going to become one of my regular things.
  • Wednesday: Warm Yoga Flow. This is a vinyasa yoga class done in a room heated to about 90 degrees.  I love taking heated yoga because you feel so much better afterward.  In the past I avoided any sort of vinyasa or flow class because the poses moved too quickly for me to keep up with, but I think I’ll be able to keep pace much better now.
  • Thursday: Zumba Step. I love Zumba and haven’t been a class in a really long time.  I somehow got out of the Saturday morning routine of going.  I think the fact that one of my favorite teachers stopped teaching at my location also had something to do with it.  When I heard that 24 Hour Fitness was featuring this new class, which includes a step, I thought it sounded like a fun thing to try. Right now the Zumba Step class is only offered in the middle of the day during the week, so this is a rare opportunity for me to try it.  If I like it, I’ll definitely seek it out once summer starts.
  • Friday: Body Combat. This is a Les Mills class and the description taken straight from their website says, “This fiercely energetic program is inspired by mixed martial arts and draws from a wide array of disciplines such as karate, boxing, taekwondo, tai chi and muay thai. During this ultimate warrior workout, you’ll strike, punch, kick and kata your way through calories to superior cardio fitness.” I’m not sure if I’m physically ready for the class, but I figured it doesn’t hurt to try.

All of these classes are brand new to me, and I’m excited to try them.  You guys know how much I love variety in my workouts, so this is something that I’m really looking forward to.  A few of the classes, like Spin and Body Combat, are offered several times a week at the gym, so if I like them I can take them regularly. Warm Yoga Flow is offered a few times throughout the week at the yoga studio I like to go to, but I only have a limited number of classes that I’ve paid for, so I’ll need to space those classes out a bit if I like it.  Pilates and Zumba Step are only offered in the morning during the week, so I’ll have to wait for summer if I really like those.

I really can’t wait to see how I perform in these classes, and I think each of them will offer a challenge, but one that I can achieve. So many times in the past, I had the desire to take classes like these, but physically I just wasn’t up to the task.  Not to mention that feeling of “other” that I got whenever I looked around a room and saw that I was, by far, the biggest person in there.  What a different experience it will be this time! Just another way that this weight loss has transformed (and is transforming) my life.

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Until next Sunday, my friends. I hope the scale treats you well, and that you have a wonderful week!

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2014-02-02 09.10.57

February – love is in the air, and this month is going to be all about loving myself enough to continue making 2014 my year to shine. I’m vowing here and now that I will reach my goal weight in 2014. What an amazing accomplishment it will be! To achieve my goals, I’m going to focus on the basics – eating well, drinking lots of water, taking my vitamins and getting in 5 cardio workouts a week. I’ve started strength training with #ToneItUp and their #LoveYourBody series is helping see just how strong I am as I change my body. Sunday weigh-ins will keep me accountable through the weekend. This month is going to be all about loving all the little things that make life special. My Sunday progress updates will be called Fabulous February Weigh-Ins.

Week 37 was wonderful! Throughout the week, I felt lighter and smaller, and my clothes were showing all the hard work I’d been putting into my workouts.  I made some really delicious meals that made me feel like I was nourishing my body in a really creative way.  This week a lot of new people complimented me on my weight loss, the sweetest of which was one of the custodians at school who is so shy and meek – when he told me that I look great and to “keep it up,” it really made me smile.  And I topped it all off with a fantastic shopping trip that became a milestone.

So, what did the scale show?!

When I weighed in this morning, I was 194.6, which is a loss of 2.8 pounds this week, and a loss of 82.4 lbs since surgery! I’ve lost a total of 120.4 pounds from my highest weight!! I have 44.6 pounds to go to my ultimate goal weight of 150 pounds. This week’s weight big loss was so important for me, because all of my hard work is paying off.  Finally my body has relaxed into the strength training exercises I’ve been doing with #ToneItUp, and I think I’m really getting the metabolic benefits of toning.  I worked hard with my cardio, as well.  I had tons of variety this week: elliptical, bike, walking, and I also went to the gym twice to get back into the run/walk intervals.  (More on that in a minute). I kept my meals really interesting and delicious with dinners like grilled salmon, sauteed scallops, grilled sirloin tips, and a breakfast-for-dinner scramble.  Lunches were just as good: I turned the leftover grilled salmon and sirloin into amazing salads with arugula.  All in all, it was such a great week, and I love that it all showed up on the scale, too.

As I mentioned, I got back to the run/walks this week, and I have to say, they’ve been a lot more difficult for me than they were before my cold.  The main reason is that I’ve been pushing myself with the speed, and I think I need to ease up on that a bit.  I’ve been trying to keep the running at a 5.0 pace, but right now, that’s just a bit too fast for me to maintain for an entire 3-minute cycle, so I’ve been cutting it down to 2 minutes, which is less than ideal.  I’m meeting my friend Di to do another run/walk session a bit later this morning, and my plan is to take my pace down to 4.5 and maintain that for 3 minutes so I can get back to a strong 3/1 pace.  (3 minutes running, 1 minute walking).

This week I’m looking forward to keeping lots of variety in my cardio workouts – run/walk intervals, recumbent bike, elliptical, flow yoga (since I had such a great experience on Saturday), and of course walking Sofi.  I’ll also continue the ToneItUp strength training, which I’m really enjoying.  I’ve loved being active for a long time now, but I’m finding that my workouts are actually becoming my hobby, and I miss doing them on my rest days.  I can see a future where fitness moves into more than just a hobby for me, and becomes a profession.

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Until next Sunday, my friends. I hope the scale treats you well, and that you have a wonderful week!

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2014-02-02 09.10.57

February – love is in the air, and this month is going to be all about loving myself enough to continue making 2014 my year to shine. I’m vowing here and now that I will reach my goal weight in 2014. What an amazing accomplishment it will be! To achieve my goals, I’m going to focus on the basics – eating well, drinking lots of water, taking my vitamins and getting in 5 cardio workouts a week. I’ve started strength training with #ToneItUp and their #LoveYourBody series is helping see just how strong I am as I change my body. Sunday weigh-ins will keep me accountable through the weekend. This month is going to be all about loving all the little things that make life special. My Sunday progress updates will be called Fabulous February Weigh-Ins.

Week 36 was perfect in its normalcy: there were a few long workdays, but I was able to come home and get my workouts in anyway.    Best of all, I didn’t let the cold stop me, and I think working out through it was actually what helped me get better. This week I also made great meals for myself, and even found a bit of time for pampering.

So, what did the scale show?!

When I weighed in this morning, I was 197.4, which is a loss of 0.8 pounds this week, and a loss of 79.6 lbs since surgery! I’ve lost a total of 117.6 pounds from my highest weight!! I have 47.4 pounds to go to my ultimate goal weight 0f 150 pounds. I’m glad to see a loss on the scale this week after last week’s gain.  The scale actually showed an even greater loss at one point this week, but then popped back up a bit.  I think my body is still adjusting to these #ToneItUp workouts, but even with this somewhat meager loss, I’m still really enjoying them.  I like seeing what my body can do, and in fact I’m ready to move up from my 5-lb dumbbells to 8-lb ones. Strength training is proving to be a really good way to challenge myself in a whole new way.

Even though I got in 5 cardio sessions, I took the week off of my run/walk intervals because running was a bit too strenuous for my lungs, but I’m hoping to get back to it a bit later this week.  I’m finding out that taking any time off of running sets me back a bit; the good thing is that once I do start back to the intervals, it doesn’t take too long to feel back on track.  I’ve done a 5K every month since September (two in November!), but I won’t be doing one in February, because I’m just not ready.  I have signed up for two in March, which will be fun.

I’m looking forward to a great week ahead.  I have a few fun things planned, including going to a book signing in San Fran for Jen Lancaster’s newest book. I just got back from the grocery store and I bought a bunch of healthy, delicious ingredients for lunches and dinners that I can’t wait to prepare.  Plus, today is Superbowl Sunday, which is always a good time, even when my team isn’t it in:

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Until next Sunday, my friends. I hope the scale treats you well, and that you have a wonderful week!

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new year new me

2014 – a new year, a fresh start full of new beginnings. 2014 is going to be MY year to shine. I’m vowing here and now that I will reach my goal weight in 2014. What an amazing accomplishment it will be! To achieve my goals, I’m going to focus on the basics – eating well, drinking lots of water, taking my vitamins and getting in 5 workouts a week. Sunday weigh-ins will keep me accountable through the weekend. My resolution throughout the year is to keep focused while enjoying all the “newness” in my life. My Sunday progress updates will be called New Year, New ME Weigh-Ins.

Week 35 was a weird one.  Work was busy, I got a bad cold, and I started strength training using the workouts from Tone It Up.

So, what did the scale show?!

When I weighed in this morning, I was 198.2, which is a gain of 2.4 pounds this week, and a loss of 78.8 lbs since surgery! I’ve lost a total of 116.8 pounds from my highest weight!! I have 48.2 pounds to go to my ultimate goal weight 0f 150 pounds. This is my first gain in the 8+ months since surgery (and even a few months before that), and while it’s disappointing to see the scale move in this direction, it was completely expected.  My body always reacts this way whenever I start using weights.  Plus, I had a bad cold, and Mother Nature is coming calling any day now.  At one point this week I was up over 5 pounds, so this is actually my body calming down a bit.  I’m so glad that I know all of these things about my body so that I’m not freaking out over a gain like this, especially with as hard as I worked all week. I’m also glad that I’m still in Onederland, let’s be honest.

As I mentioned in my post the other day, I’ve started strength training using the Tone It Up (#TIU) workouts, and I’m really enjoying them.  I know they’re working because I’m sore, but I love that very few of the moves are too difficult for me to complete.  It shows how far I’ve come.  It’s nice to have another measure of fitness successes, beyond my cardio workouts.

Today Tinkerbell and I are doing our first 5K together, and I’m really looking forward to it.  Unfortunately, because of my cold, which is settling in my chest now, we’re going to walk the whole thing instead of doing run/walk intervals, as we’d planned.  I’m really glad that Tinkerbell doesn’t mind us taking it a bit easier.  Plus, this way we can spend the time catching up – last weekend she completed the Tinkerbell Half Marathon at Disneyland, something she’d been training for for over 6 months.  I’m so proud of her, and I can’t wait to hear all the details. (I’ll post more about our 5K later today).

This coming week, I’m looking forward to continuing the #TIU workouts (a new weekly series comes in my inbox today!), picking up my 3/1 run/walk intervals as soon as this cold dies down and my respiration is easier,  and hopefully seeing the scale go down at next Sunday’s weigh in.  The thing is, I’m in this for the long haul, and I’m not worried about one bad weigh in because I know I’m stronger than any reading on the scale.  Seeing a higher number isn’t going to put me in a tailspin now, as it would have in the past.  That’s true growth, that’s something to be proud of.

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Until next Sunday, my friends. I hope the scale treats you well, and that you have a wonderful week!

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As of this morning, I’ve officially lost 100 pounds!

On October 21, 2012 I saw the highest weight I’ve ever seen recorded – 315 pounds.  Now, 375 days later, I’ve shed 100 pounds.  And really, most of the weight loss has been since my surgery date – May 20, 2013.  Countless hours of workouts, so many meals weighed and measured, all those days that I logged every bite. All worth this feeling I’m experiencing right now. After eighteen years of struggle with obesity, and a lifetime of being overweight, this accomplishment literally brings tears of joy to my eyes.

I thought I’d have so much to say when I hit this tremendous goal, but words escape me.  Losing weight eluded me for so long – my terrible metabolism after all those years of yo-yo dieting.  All that mental struggle with emotional eating.  Tremendous frustration and pain whenever I tried to exert myself physically.  And finally, after VSG surgery and transforming my life, I’ve realized the success I knew I had in me all along.  It’s fantastic!

So rather than babble on, I thought I’d show some photos that depict just how far I’ve come.

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When I took the before, I remember thinking that I looked good – sophisticated. How when I see the photo on the right, I realize how puffy my face looked before.

The photo on the left wasn't at my heaviest weight, but it does show me in a "before." The left was taken just the other day.  I like the way my hair looks straight so much that I am going to get a keratin treatment so I can straighten it myself more easily.

The photo on the left wasn’t at my heaviest weight, but it does show me in a “before.” The left was taken just the other day. I like the way my hair looks straight so much that I am going to get a keratin treatment so I can straighten it myself more easily.

The before was Halloween a few years ago, again, not at my very heaviest, but still obese. And the pic on the right was taken yesterday, this Halloween.

The before was Halloween a few years ago, again, not at my very heaviest, but still obese. And the pic on the right was taken yesterday, this Halloween.

I’m proud of all that I’ve achieved and look forward to all the milestones yet to come. Next up, Onederland!!

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I have been dying to write this post all day, but I’ve been stuck at work doing a million things at once, but I’ve finally got some time to sit down and write this. 

As you guys know, last Monday I started following Kaiser’s Lap Band pre-op 1200-calorie/day meal plan.  I have been using LoseIt to track my calories, and while I’ve been over 1200 each day, most days I’ve been between 1300-1400, which is still relatively low.  I’ve been focusing my meals around protein, and eating much less starch than I normally do.  Most of my carbs are coming from fruits/veggies, and while I do still eat rice, pasta, or other grains, I’m limiting them to 2-3 servings a day. 

I should also mention that this first week on the new meal plan has been my first week of quitting smoking.  Trying to quit and eating reduced calories has proved a bit challenging, but I actually surprised myself by doing so well this week (on both fronts). 

Possible TMI: One of the negative things that comes along with quitting smoking (besides an increase in appetite) is constipation.  I haven’t had too much of a problem with that this week, although this morning I did experience a bit.  To combat this, I’m going to start taking a fiber supplement, because the last thing I want to be is “backed up.”

I didn’t limit my social interactions this week, since it was my last full week before school starts back up and my time is more scarce.  Which means that I ate socially, I drank socially, and I enjoyed myself in moderation.  I was a bit worried about what these different eating/drinking events would do to the results on the scale, but as you’ll see, moderation is key.

Now, let’s get to that scale shot:

 Which means I lost 3.3 pounds this week!  An excellent start to the first week on a new program, I’d say.  Especially with everything else that’s been going on this past week.  I was so thrilled that my weight loss held steady from when I peeked at it earlier this week.  It shows me that following a lower calorie diet and eating/drinking socially in moderation really works.  I didn’t eat a lot of high-calorie foods, but I didn’t totally limit myself from them, either.  It makes me feel even more convinced that the Lap Band is going to work for me, because that’s the ultimate tool to practice moderation, since it limits the amount of food/drink you can consume. 

Overall, I’m hugely impressed with my attitude, my focus, and my determination.  I want to keep riding this wave, because I’ve been feeling so great about myself and my progress, and it’s been quite a while since I’ve been so happy about everything. 

Some goals for this coming week:

  1. Water.  I got in at least 48oz every day this past week, but I should be taking in at least 64oz, so I have to fit in a few more glasses to reach my minimum goal.  I know I can do it, I just have to put it into practice.
  2. Exercise.  As I mentioned yesterday, I did a bit of extra movement this week, but only a few days.  I would like to get back to working out 4-5 days of the week, at least. 
  3. Continue tracking in LoseIt.
  4. Stay to 1200 calories more closely than I did this week.

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Housing Update: I heard back from my future landlord yesterday, and he said that barring any unforeseen things on the background check, the duplex is mine!  This is fantastic news, and I am beyond thrilled.  I’m going to meet with him on Saturday to iron out the details of the deposit, etc., but by early next week, I should know FOR SURE that the place is mine.  Stay tuned. 

Smoke Free, Day 8 and I’m going strong. 

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We all have our hard times and setbacks, but one of the things I always keep in mind and say to myself is if I keep at my goal, or whatever it is I want to achieve, it has no choice but to give in.  That’s one thing I love about all of this is.  I know I’m going to get progress, I know it’s going to change, as long as I stick with it.  No matter how much I get set back, as long as I keep pushing this wall, it’s going to fall.  Or, if I keep climbing up, I’m going to get to the top of that hill. ~~Jennifer Hudson

This quote comes from Jennifer Hudson’s interview with the Editor in Chief of WW.com (Jennifer is the new celebrity spokesperson for WW).  I watched the interview on YouTube and was completely inspired.  I often feel like I’m beating my head against a brick wall when it comes to weight loss – I’ll have a great day of eating and activity and then it will all go down the tubes with one bad choice (usually involving Ben & Jerry’s or some other over-indulgence).  And of course my weight doesn’t move.  I’ll have one great week and then the next week I’m back up to where I was. But I can’t really blame anyone but myself. I am the brick wall sometimes.

In fact, this weekend I was talking to Ish about weight loss struggles & frustrations and for a moment I entertained the idea of getting a lap band procedure.  But then in my mind I remembered Ruby, who has lost over 200 lbs on her own through a lifestyle change.  And Kirstie Alley, who is getting back to weight loss by eating well and exercising.  And all of you, who are sticking to your goals and making it happen.  Trying something as drastic as surgery to try to control my weight isn’t the answer.  The answer has to come from within me.

Later in the interview, Jennifer Hudson says “as long as you’re trying, change will come.” And that’s what it all boils down to.  I have to be consistent in my “trying” otherwise, I can’t really expect to see a change on the scale.

So this week, starting today, it’s all about really trying.  I feel like I’ve said that so many times before, and I know I have.  But life isn’t perfect, and I’m definitely not perfect, and as long as I have the desire to try and improve my health through weight loss, I’m going to continue this fight.  Sometimes the fight is with outside influences, but most of the time the fight is internal, and that’s the one at which I have to prevail.

Part 1 of the interview is here:

The interview is a bit awkward, because there doesn’t seem to be any rapport between the editor and Jennifer Hudson, but the information contained within is really great.  Especially in part two:

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Before I begin, I must admit that the idea for this post came from reading this one from Scale Warfare and this one from Merry.  I’m all about making goals, plans, and ways to help myself succeed, so this is the perfect post to begin 2010.

Each of these goals is another step towards success!

Bella’s 10 Goals for 2010

  1. Track what I eat every single day. Even if it’s not going to be pretty, I want to make sure that I’m being honest with myself.  Accountability is a huge part of eating on plan, and I want to make sure that I don’t shortchange myself by living in denial.  WW makes it easy with eTools and I also have the WW app on my iPhone, so there really is no excuse not to log it all in.
  2. Send Scale Warfare nightly food journal emails. This was a great way for me to stay accountable to someone other than myself.  Knowing that I had to send someone the journal made me think twice about whether I should eat something.  Plus, Scale Warfare isn’t judgmental, but I know that she’ll give me a good kick in the butt if I need it.
  3. Keep Sundays as my “get prepared” day. After waking up a bit late and reading the Sunday paper, I’m going to go to the grocery store to stock up on healthy food for the week and then prepare at least 2 big dinners that I can eat throughout the week.  I also want to make sure that I’ve portioned out all of my weekly lunchtime snacks, as well.
  4. Make dinner for myself at least 6 nights a week. This won’t be too difficult, especially if I continue on my Sunday ritual.  I do want to give myself at least one night a week (most likely Friday or Saturday) to go out or eat other food.  Still keeping it healthy, but allowing for some social interaction, as well.  Cuz a girl can’t stay home all the time, right?
  5. Move my body for at least 30 minutes every day. Some days this “movement” will be rigorous, such as when I’m in the gym at a training session with Jimmy.  Or when I’m doing the C25K training.  Other days it will be more laid back, like playing Wii Fit Plus, taking a walk, or riding my bike.  No matter what, I want to make sure that I’m active this year.
  6. Run a 5K by the end of June 2010. This is what Rubenesque Ladies Running is all about.  See the widget on the sidebar for more info, or click on “Bella’s RLR” tab above. This is going to be a huge challenge, but if I stick to my training program, I know I’ll be able to do it.
  7. Lose 82 pounds in 2010. This is an ambitious goal, but I think it’s one that I can reach.  It’s less than 2 pounds a week (1.57, to be exact), which is what everyone says is a healthy amount to lose.  Plus, it would be a little over halfway to my goal weight, which would be amazing.  Plus, it would mean that I  am finally in Onederland – under 200 pounds.
  8. Try 1 new recipe per week. I did this last year, and while I didn’t quite make my goal of 52 new recipes, I did make quite a few.  It was fun, and I had a good time discovering that not only do I love cooking, but that I’m a good cook (if I do say so myself!).  I have tons of cookbooks, magazines, and internet recipes.  The first step for me is going to be organizing all of it into a binder with page protectors so that my “new recipes” are accessible and ready when I want to try them out.
  9. Earn my rewards. On my “Bella’s Progress” page, I have a whole list of amazing rewards that I’ve planned for myself when I hit certain weight goals.  I haven’t earned any of them yet, but I want to make 2010 the year that I get to spend some money on myself because I’ve earned it through hard work and real results.
  10. No out of control eating. This is huge for me, because it is the #1 thing that derailed my progress last year.  I would do so well all day, but then it was like something took over my body (and mind) when I got home, and all I wanted to do was eat and eat and eat.  Most of the time the food I was eating wasn’t “bad,” but anything in such large quantities isn’t good.  This year I will repeat the following statements whenever I start to have that “out of control” feeling:

I am stronger than this; I can be in control of myself and what I eat.  I’m worth more than this.  I want to reach my goals more than I want this food.

So, there you have them.  These goals for myself are now “out there” in the universe, and I know that I will achieve them (or get pretty darn close, anyway).  I have a strong sense of determination, more than I ever have in the past.  Not only that, I am taking action so that I can achieve all that I am determined to do.  Of course, along with those 10, I am going to keep blogging at least 5 days a week, and if last year was any indication, probably more.

What are your goals for yourself this year?

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Can you believe that we’re in the first week of December already?  I can’t.  This year has flown by, especially since September!  But enough of me trying to avoid talking about the weigh in.  Without further ado…

 Yep, that’s right, I gained. 4.3 pounds to be exact.  I didn’t weigh in last week, so this is technically the weight gain for  the past two weeks, but regardless, it’s a big gain, which sucks. 

I wasn’t sure what the scale would bring, because it’s TOM time again, and I didn’t track at all while I was away for Thanksgiving.  It felt freeing, in a way.  I ate when I was hungry, tried to make the best choices possible, and didn’t put too much pressure on myself.  I didn’t eat as many meals as I usually do, but my portions were bigger than normal on the meals that I did eat, so I was thinking that thing would work out in the end.  I also got a lot of walking in once we got to Chicago, which felt good.

So, moving forward into these last 3 weeks of 2009, I’m going to slowly get back in to working out.  I haven’t worked out at all since I’ve had bronchitis, but I’m finally feeling better now. The plan for this week is all about the Wii – Fit Plus, Sports Active, and Biggest Loser game.  Between those three Wii games, I should get in a decent workout each day, and slowly get my body back into working out mode.  Next week, I’m going to incorporate going to the gym on my own, along with the Wii.  The final two weeks I’ll be home on Winter Break, so I can really kick up my workouts and take some group exercise classes at the gym to get back on track to start seeing Jimmy when the new year comes. I’m really looking forward to moving my body again.  I’ve missed the sense of accomplishment that comes with it.

One thing I’ve noticed this week is that even though it’s hard to stay on a weight loss plan when away from home, it was easier not to overindulge because I wasn’t by myself at night.  My parents have always been huge supporters of mine, in life and in weight loss.  My mom is naturally slim now, although she was a bit overweight as a child.  But she sees herself as much heavier than she really is.  Growing up, she was very concerned about my sister’s and my weight, and I think we were always a bit more conscious of our eating when she was around.  I noticed that on this trip, because my parents and I were together every waking moment, I was much more conscientious about my eating.  I didn’t give in and eat more than I should just because something looked good or I had the “need” to eat.  Being in the company of other people at meal times definitely made it more of a social thing, and less about just the food itself.

Living alone, I have a lot of advantages because I only have to worry about cooking for myself and I can make anything that tickles my fancy.  The down side of living alone is that I’m not accountable to anyone.  If someone were here with me I know I wouldn’t overindulge as much as I do at night sometimes.  Even if they weren’t paying any attention to what I was doing, I know I’d never binge eat.  I care too much about appearances.  As it is now, I sometimes give in to the urges, and it’s easy for me to rationalize it to myself.

What I am going to do in these last four weeks is stop this roller coaster of gaining some, losing some, and regaining it again.  It has to end.  The way it ends is for me to stop giving in to every food whim that pops into my mind.  Especially at night.  This isn’t a holiday food and parties thing.  This is a getting a handle on my eating thing.  I need to stop fooling around and start to take this seriously, otherwise I’m going to keep doing this roller coaster dance and I’ll never get to my goal.  I need to start now so that I can begin 2010 with a renewed sense of purpose and focus on my goal.

I feel like much of this year was spent getting myself into the proper mindset.  Finding the time in my busy schedule for working out, cooking healthy meals, and preparing for the day.  I’ve got that down.  I’ve made lifestyle changes that will stick with me.  Now I need to go into 2010 with the drive and determination to take this weight off.  I need to stop playing games with myself and rationalizing when I eat more than I should.

It’s not that some people have willpower and some don’t.  It’s that some people are ready to change and others are not.” – James Gordon.

I’m ready to change! I am ready to take control! I am ready to get to goal!

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