Going Outside My Comfort Zone: I Have a Date!

(I’m not so sure about the staying up late…yet)

As you guys know, I signed up for Match.com at the beginning of December.  Up to this point, there have been quite a few guys who have winked, liked photos, and even emailed me, but very few who truly sparked my interest.  And of those, fewer still whose attention I seemed to hold for longer than the time it took them to contact me.

What is it with guys who contact you, wink at you, and “like” every photo you have on your profile, only to disappear after you email them back?  It’s just as well,  I don’t need someone who’s not able to give me his attention for more than a day. I’m sure it just wasn’t meant to be.  Oh, and to the guy who sent me the note asking, “is it true what they day about not trusting a big butt and a smile?” all I had to say to him was…REALLY?! (Oh, I have some doozies I could share, but maybe that’s for another post).

There have been a couple of guys who I’ve communicated with back and forth on Match.com email, and I found them to be intriguing enough to consider meeting up for coffee/drinks.  So I waited, answered their emails, and waited some more.

And then I decided to do something I would normally never do – I decided to suggest that we meet up for coffee.  Now I now this will probably surprise those of you who know me in real life or even through this blog.  I’m so bold, so confident, so strong – why would making the first move be weird for me?  Because I am a traditional girl when it comes to dating.  I like the guy to make the first move; that way I know he’s really into me, and isn’t just being nice.  But I threw caution to the wind and sent this message to the two guys I was interested in:

I hope you’ve had a great new year’s so far. Mine has been really nice. I love how the beginning of a new year is so full of possibility & promise.

With that said, I’m going to go way outside my comfort zone and ask if you’d like to meet up sometime for coffee. I’m interested in getting to know you better, and I think there’s only so much you can learn online. My number is xxx-xxx-xxxx if you’d like to text/call me and set something up.

And you know what?  It worked!  One of the guys, whom I’ll refer to as CannoliD (because he has a great photo of himself eating a cannoli in Rome on his profile)  responded the very next day, and we’re going to go to coffee late next week.  We haven’t set up the specific date yet because he’s not feeling well, but I think it will be on Saturday.

How fun!  I’m not going into this with any expectations, other than to get to know him better.  The small amount I do know from CannoliD’s profile and our emails are all things that I really like:

• 40 years old
• no kids
• has a professional job
• has a college degree, in fact, he attended my same college
• is from my city
• owns his own home
• is Italian!
• is a dog owner (he also has a cat, but I’m not going to hold that against him. Have I ever mentioned my huge fear of cats?  They FREAK me out! Don’t judge, some people are scared of little, tiny spiders)
• has the sweetest smile
• seems like a genuinely nice guy

I don’t want to make too much of this because who knows if there will even be a second date, but I will say that I’m looking forward to it.  If for no other reason than that it’s been 5 years (has it REALLY been that long?!) since I’ve been on a date, and I’m ready to get back out there and see what happens.

Wish me luck!

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#Reverb13, Day 3: Brave

Throughout the month of December, I’ll be participating in #reverb13: Reverb is a way to reflect on the past year and project into the next year with a prompt a day for 31 days.  December is the perfect time to reflect on 2013 and start to create intentions for 2014.

Day 3 – Brave
What was the bravest thing you did in 2013?

Some might say that it took a lot of courage to have weight loss surgery back in May, but I would disagree.  That was something I’d wanted for so long, that I’d worked toward for over 2 1/2 years. I had no worries, no doubts that anything would go wrong.  I wasn’t nervous the day of or even as they led me into surgery.  So I wouldn’t say that my surgery was the bravest thing I did.

This may sound silly, but I’d say that signing up for Match.com was the bravest thing I’ve done in 2013.  And I just did it on Sunday.

I haven’t put myself out there in the dating world in over 3 years because for the longest time, I wasn’t attracting the types of guys I wanted to date.  My philosophy was, “if I wouldn’t date him at my goal weight, I’m not going to date him now.” I preferred being single to settling, and I still do.

But as much as I love my life exactly as it is, there are those times when I want to cuddle on the couch with someone special.  Someone to take romantic drives with.  Someone to whisk me away on spontaneous weekends.  Someone to share intimate moments with.  You get the idea.

The bravery comes in because I’m putting myself out there and hoping that “Mr. Right” and I are able to connect.  I’m not at my goal weight, but I’m proud of how I’ve transformed, and I hope that someone else can recognize that.  (It seems a few gents like the curves my profile photos display).  I’m not sure how to go about this whole thing, and I’m definitely not leading with the fact that I’ve lost over 100 pounds (that’s something I’ll share after a few dates, if it goes that far).  But it is fun to see who’s out there.  So far there have been a few interesting prospects, but it’s far too early to really know. I’m being hopeful.  I’m daring to dream a bit.

So wish me luck!

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#Reverb12, Day 10: Your Greatest Risk?

Throughout the month of December, I’ll be participating in #reverb12: celebrating the successes of 2012, honoring the challenges of 2012, and planting the seeds for a rich and rewarding 2013. December is the perfect time to reflect on the year that has passed and start to manifest dreams for the new year.

Day 10 – What was the greatest risk you took in 2012? What was the outcome??

As boring as it sounds, I really didn’t take many risks in 2012.  I’d say I stood the course on most of my endeavors, and just put my nose to the grindstone and kept it moving.

This sounds so unlike me, because I’m bold, extroverted, and very passionate, so I feel compelled to make a list of risks I want to take in 2013:

1.  Finally undergo weight loss surgery
2.  Take a trip by myself, even if it’s just a couple of hours away.  Explore a “new” city on my own and stay somewhere overnight by myself just for fun.
3.  In the latter part of 2013, sign up on an online dating site and go on no fewer than 5 dates.

Not a bad challenge, eh?  I guess you’ll just have to keep tuned in to see if the risks will offer great rewards. I know I’m excited to see what comes from them.

What risk did you undertake in 2012?

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