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reverb13-blog-button Throughout the month of December, I’ll be participating in #reverb13: Reverb is a way to reflect on the past year and project into the next year with a prompt a day for 31 days.  December is the perfect time to reflect on 2013 and start to create intentions for 2014.

Day 30: Relationships

Relationships | Did you find a new best friend?  Delve deeper into a relationship?  Break up?  Get back together?  Tell us about who you added – or subtracted – from your life.  Why?

My friendships are so important to me, and I try to nurture them as much as possible.  Now that we’re in our 40s and busy with jobs, families, and other obligations, getting together is a lot more challenging.  Still, I try to make sure I get together with each of my friends (and sometimes a few of them at once) for coffee or something at least once a month.  Most of my friends are girls I’ve known since high school, and it’s really fantastic to know people that long.  These are tried-and-true friends.  Ride or die chicks.  Girls who have seen me through everything, and me them. We’ll always be in each other’s lives.  One major goal I have in 2014, which I started at the end of 2013 is to get together with them much more often.  To do things together, not just coffee and convo, but getting out and about and doing fun things, too.

One friendship that has blossomed in 2013 is with Tinkerbell.  She and I really started to hang out at the very beginning of January 2013, and our friendship has grown so much over the course of this year.  We have so much in common, including both getting the VSG. It’s fantastic having someone in real life to discuss all the issues that come up with having had weight loss surgery.  But beyond that, we have similar values, live in the same neighborhood (within 5 minutes driving), and like to do the same things. Tinkerbell is incredible supportive, so generous, and absolutely inspiring.  Whenever I see her post about her long runs on MyFitnessPal, I get motivated to do my walk/run intervals.  We have a great time shopping, getting our hair blown out, and delving into more serious topics, too.  I’m so grateful that we’ve become so close, and consider her one of my best friends.

A few of my most cherished friends are women who have moved far from me, but the distance doesn’t inhibit our friendship because of this great age of technology.  It’s not quite the same as being in the same room, but being able to check in on Facebook share our daily smiles through photos and statuses helps us stay connected.  Plus, with things like Facetime and texting, we can keep up with each other as if we did live in the same city.

And then there are the blogging buddies, pals on MFP, and WLS peeps on YouTube and FB  who have offered me so much support, encouragement, and happiness that they are definitely people I count among my friends, even though we’ve never met.  I am so thankful to have them in my lives.

In terms of romantic relationships, I recently signed up for Match.com, and while I find the entire process terribly slow, it has given me a bit of a boost to know that some of these men find me attractive enough to email, wink at, or contact.  I haven’t dated in years, and now that I’ve put myself back out there, I’m really hoping that 2014 brings me some fun dates (or maybe something even more serious) in the love department.

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Happy Monday! It’s been a few weeks since I’ve been able to write up an FMM post, and I’m really looking forward to participating.  This weekend was a fun one – I went to a Beauty Trend Show at Nordstrom on Saturday and treated myself to a couple of products as a reward for losing 90 pounds.  Sunday I spent the day with family, watching my 49ers lose, and saying goodbye to Dexter as I watched the series finale.

But let’s get to this week’s Friend Makin’ Monday. I’m really interested in this week’s topic because after years of taking myself off the market when it comes to dating, I think I *may* finally be ready to dip my toe in the pond.  My friends keep encouraging me to join an online dating site, and I think I may do it next month.  (One of my goals for the year was to join an online dating site before the end of November, so this would be a bit ahead of schedule).

If you’ve taken part in FMM then you know the rules. If you’re new, please take a moment to answer this week’s question on your own blog then add your link in the comments section at: www.alltheweigh.com so we can all see your FMM questions and answers. Please invite your blog readers to add their links here too so everyone has to opportunity to be seen. The idea is to connect with other awesome bloggers so take a moment to post your own FMM post and comment on a couple of other posts. Now it’s time for this week’s topic!

 

FMM: Relationships and Dating

1.  List five characteristics that you think are important in a significant other.

  1. Attraction – It’s not all about looks, but I do think being physically attracted to someone is a big factor.
  2. Intelligence – He’s got to match me, otherwise I’ll be bored.
  3. Financial Security – I want my guy to at least make what I do, which isn’t too difficult, considering the paltry sum I get paid to teach.
  4. Ambition – I’m very ambitious, both with my career and in the goals I’ve set for myself, and it would be better if my guy was of a similar mindset.
  5. Fun – It’s really important that we can have a good time together.  Our idea of how we like to spend leisure time should match up.

2.  If you had to choose between staying single for the next two years (as in, no dating at all,) or receiving $10,000, which would you choose?  At first I thought I’d take the money, but $10,000 isn’t enough to for two years.  If it was $50K or more, I’d probably choose the money. I’m used to being single (I haven’t dated in 4 years), and I can always use more money.

3.  What is your relationship status?  Are you satisfied with it?  I’m single and have been for longer than I can remember.  Even when I was dating over 4 years ago, it wasn’t really a “significant other” situation.  So, I guess I’d say I’m very comfortable with the life I’ve created, but having someone romantic in my life would be a nice addition.

4.  Would you date someone who has children?  Since I’ve made the decision not to have children, I’d prefer if the guy I’m dating doesn’t have children living with him.  Or has children who are older – late teens.

5.  Would you date someone who’s shorter than you?  No.  I’m 5″3′ and I don’t want to date someone who’s less than 5″9′ in his socks.  I like taller guys.

6.  Would you date someone who has different political views?  No, I’d find it difficult to date someone who’s core beliefs were vastly different from my own.

7.  If you were going on vacation together, would you choose the beach or the mountains?  It really depends.  I think both venues could be really romantic.  I love the beach (obvi – blog title and all), but cozying up in a mountain cabin could be really fun, too.

8.  How do you show someone that you’re interested in them?  Flirting?  It’s been so long I’m wayyyyy out of practice.  I think in person, it’s all about eye contact.

9.  Do you prefer to date people who are older than you or younger?  It really doesn’t matter. I think I’m young at heart, so I could date younger very easily.  But as long as the person had the characteristics I’m looking for, older would be fine, too.

10.  Share some details of your dream date. A dream date would be anything the guy put effort into planning.  I have lots of interests and can enjoy all sorts of venues, so something that meant he was thinking of me as he figured it out would mean a lot and really impress me.

Now it’s your turn to answer the questions!   And also be sure to go back to Kenlie’s blog and leave a link to your FMM post in the comments!  I really encourage you to comment on as many people’s posts as you can – I’ve met some fantastic people through FMM.  You never know who you’ll meet today.

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