HYC Update – Facing down demons

I have a confession to make – last week I didn’t make it to my WW meeting on Thursday.  Regular readers know this is a terrible habit I have – if I see something that I may not like on the scale the morning of my WW mtg, I often skip it.  It’s called DENIAL and AVOIDANCE, and I’m working hard to get over it and not get so caught up on the numbers on the scale, but it’s a process.

So, since I felt so guilty for not going to the meeting, I told myself that this week I was going to be a good Weight Watcher.  I was going to track every single thing I ate, no matter what happened.  And I was going to earn some major Activity Points.  Check and check.

I tracked even on Thursday when I had some sort of monster take over my appetite, and I wanted to have second portions at dinner, totally 50 points that day!  I tracked on Saturday, when our bocce appetizers and my dinner later in the evening made for a 60 point day!  But even though I had some really high point days, I tracked, and for me this week, that was all that mattered.

And I got in some major exercise – 28 points so far this week, and I still have two more full days before weigh-in on Thursday morning (which also happens to be my birthday – I’m hoping the scale will bring me a birthday present).  I swam, I Wii Fit’d, I EA Sport Active’d.  I’m loving unlocking new and more challenging games on the Wii Fit, figuring out a workaround for the EA Sports Active leg band problem, and overcoming major InnerFatGirl negativity when it comes to swimming.

I’ve faced quite a few demons this week, but I stood up to them.  Hell, I looked them square in the eyes and made THEM run the other way.  It’s been an awesome week.  So, no matter what the scale shows on my birthday weigh-in at my WW mtg (yes, I’m going to go, no matter what), I’m proud of myself.  Now I just hope the scale won’t be giving me a gift that I’d rather return.

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Enough with the rain, already!

If I’m not mistaken, today is May 2nd.  Way past the time when we should be dealing with rain in my area of Northern California.  Ugh.

Don’t get me wrong, during the winter, I love the rain.  It makes me feel all comfy, cozy and gives the perfect excuse to stay inside and cuddle up with a good book, watch a movie marathon, or have a long phone conversation with a friend.  But it is no longer winter – we are officially in spring, and I’ve had it with this weird weather! Less than two weeks ago we were dying from the 98+ temps and now we’re dealing with rain?!!

One of the reasons I’m less than thrilled with this weather is that it means that I have to do my 20 minutes of the WW Walk-It Challenge at the gym on the treadmill.  So far, I’ve been able to avoid the treadmill because the weather has been nice.  I much prefer walking outside in the fresh air to the treadmill.  But, I guess I should consider myself lucky that I have the option and that a little rain isn’t going to stop me from getting in my daily walk.

All of this blathering on about the weather is supposed to distract you from the fact that I am not writing about my WW weigh-in today.  Did it work?

Ok, so ‘fess up time.  I didn’t go to my meeting today because: 1.) It’s raining.  2.) I got on the scale at home this morning and saw another slight gain.  I just can’t go to another meeting knowing I’m moving in the wrong direction.  I just can’t.

Here’s where I went wrong this week:

• I didn’t take the time to pack my lunches the night before, thus throwing things into my lunch bag at the last minute in the morning.  Some of the things I grabbed weren’t measured as carefully as they should have been.
• Other mornings I didn’t pack a lunch at all and bought it from Trader Joe’s.  I made good choices, on the surface, but I didn’t measure those Pita Chips as well as I should have.  I have such little control with certain snack foods that I simply have to pre-measure the portion and then bring only that amount – a whole bag spells trouble for me.
• Those Subway $5 Footlongs are good, but they’re also a lot of points.  Even a turkey sandwich is 11 points – that’s too much for lunch.  Eating a huge lunch like this makes my dinner options much more limited, and on two different nights, I ate well into my flex points.  From here on out, I’ll buy the footlong, but definitely only eat half –  which is a big enough portion, to be sure – and save the other half for the next day (or for dinner that night).
• Going to a wine tasting and then dinner with Ish instead of working out wasn’t such a good idea on Thursday night.  We had a great time, and I’m so glad we went, but I really should have made sure that I got a workout in.  Especially because I had eaten quite a bit of points for lunch and had no business eating out at dinner.
• The WW Walk-It Challenge is great, and I enjoy it so much, but I’m realizing that I’m not earning enough Activity Points by only walking 20ish minutes 5 days a week.  I have to make sure to do some other workout at least 3 other days of the week.  Time for the Aqua class to make a comeback.

One thing I am proud about is that I did track every point I ate this week – ALL of them.  It was what helped me recognize where I went wrong.  I really can’t stress enough how important tracking points is to me.

So, there you have it.  I know what I did wrong this week, and while I should have gone to the WW meeting and faced the music, at least I’m being accountable to you guys.

This next week is going to be all about portion sizes, increased workouts, and seeing a loss on the scale!

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WW Weigh-In: Meetings Work!

Today I knew that when I weighed in, the scale was going to show a bit of a gain.  Not only had it been an emotionally draining week because of my grandma’s funeral, but it was also my TOM.  Plus, yesterday at the reception after the funeral, I had several glasses of wine (and then more when I got home).  So, when I got on the scale at WW this morning and saw that I was up 0.8, I wasn’t too surprised.

Now, normally I would be really upset with myself for gaining weight the first week back on WW, but given all of the extenuating circumstances, I’m not going to beat myself up over it.  Plus, I’m really proud of myself for going to the meeting knowing that I was going to see a gain.  In the past, I would’ve surely skipped today’s meeting, but I’m finally at the point where I realize how important the meetings are for my success.

Remember that receptionist I mentioned last week who had the snide (rude) remark when I weighed in?  Well, I told myself that I was going to make sure that I didn’t weigh in with her today, since I figured she’d have something to say about this gain.  I was prepared to let someone else go ahead of me so I could weigh in with the leader instead.  But wouldn’t you know it, right when I was about to weigh in with the leader, she told me that she had to start the meeting.  Great.  I had to see the “holier-than-thou” lady again?  Ugh.  I got on the scale and told her right away that I knew I was going to have a gain because I had my period and that I had just gone to my grandma’s funeral yesterday.  She was actually really kind and said, “Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that.”  Then I stepped on and it registered a 0.8 gain, and I steadied myself for some sort of critical remark.  Instead, I was surprised when she said, “That’s not too bad at all.  It’s only 0.8, you can take that off in no time at all.  Next week is going to be better week for you now that all of that is behind you and you can move on.”  It was really sweet of her.  Maybe she was just having a bad day last week? Either way, I am so glad this experience was better than the last one.

The meeting this week was all about the importance of tracking.  It is so true; I’ve read so many articles that talk about how much more weight people lose when they are accountable for what they eat, and tracking does exactly that.  I never have a problem tracking because I love using eTools.  I’m a geek about anything that helps keep me more organized and uses the computer at the same time, so I love tracking.  Also, I’ve been using WW mobile on my iPhone for about 6 months, and it makes it really easy, on the go.  My biggest tip about tracking using eTools is to utilize the Favorites application.  That way, you have the different food items listed on the right hand side of the Food Tracker, and it makes tracking so much faster.

Today we had a substitute leader (Pam) at the meeting, and I loved her.  There was something about her energy that I absolutely connected with.  She was high energy and wasn’t trying too hard (as the usual leader seems to).  Also, she lost over 109 pounds on WW, which is a great inspiration to me.   I stayed at the end of the meeting to ask Pam where her regular meetings were because I enjoyed her so much.  She said to me, “you are so beautiful (as she touched my face).  I was looking at you the entire meeting because you seemed so receptive to what I was saying.”  I told her, “Well, I just felt an instant connection with you, and I’d love to go to your meetings regularly.”  She thanked me and said that they were trying to find a regular meeting for her, but for now, she’s just subbing around the area.  She told me to check the website and look for her name at a few of the local locations.  I really hope WW gets her a meeting sometime soon, because I would love for her to be my regular leader.

So, even though I didn’t have a great weigh-in, I feel good about myself and I know that next week is going to be amazing.

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Friday night thoughts

This week has been pretty exciting: new shoes, first track practice with TNT, and lots of love from family & friends in the contributions to the fundraising.

I haven’t been feeling particularly OP this week.  I should be walking on my own in order to prepare for the half marathon, but I haven’t.  Sunday and Monday nights I did a workout DVD, and I walked 3/4 of a mile on Wednesday, but that’s about it.  I’ve also had a bit of an increased appetite this week because of TOM.  I’ve been staying within my points (using my extra 35), so I shouldn’t have anything to worry about on weigh-in day, but I wasn’t as diligent about my tracking.  I did keep track of what I was eating in my head, but that never makes me feel as confident or organized as when I’m actually imputting what I’ve eaten into my Points Tracker. I usually track every day using eTools, but this week my main focus was on setting up the TNT fundraising page and making sure I thanked everyone for their donations.  I guess I should cut myself a little bit of a break, because the whole TNT thing is a whole new world, and sometimes you can only concentrate on so many things at once.

Tomorrow we’re scheduled to walk 4 miles, which is incredibly daunting.  I haven’t walked that far at once in years.  The Turkey Trot was a 5k, and that almost killed me.  Now that I have the new shoes, I’m hoping that I will be able to go a lot farther without too many problems.  They’re giving us 2 hours to walk the 4 miles, which means 30 minutes/mile, and I know I can do that.  I’m hoping I can average a 20-minute mile, but I’m going to keep the whole “slow and steady” idea in mind.  I’ll be really proud of myself for just completing it.

So next week (beginning on Sunday), I’m going to make a point of getting in more practices on my own.  Which means I’ll have to hit the gym.  I haven’t been inside my 24 Hour Fitness in months because I’ve been finding that I like working out outside of the gym better.  I’ve kept up my membership because I know I’ll use it a lot more frequently in the summer when I’m off.  I’ve been avoiding the treadmill like the plague, but now that I’ve signed up to walk the half marathon, it only makes sense to get back on it.  I’m thinking I may ease my way into it, though.  Maybe a warmup on the elliptical for about 20 minutes and then 40 minutes or so on the treadmill to start.

All in all, this week has been wonderful so far.  Lots of new, positive experiences.

I’d better get to bed now, since I have to be up at 5:30am (on a Saturday!) in order to make it to the TNT training.  Wish me luck that I don’t hit the snooze button too many times.

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WW Weigh-In #2

This week’s results weren’t great.  I gained 1.2 pounds, for a total loss of 2.6 pounds.

While I’m disappointed in the gain, I realize that it’s not that much, and I know there are some reasons for it:

• PMS.  My TOM is about to hit any day now, and I usually gain a bit when this is coming.  It also causes me to want to eat more, although I really tried to stave off the cravings I had this week.
• I didn’t get enough activity in this week.  I earned 10 APs, which isn’t enough to meet my personal goal of 21 APs a week.  I did the 30 Day Shred once, and yesterday I took a 9 mile bike ride, but it wasn’t enough.  I know I need to be more consistent in my activity in order to see consistent losses on the scale.

In spite of the gain, I am proud of myself:

• I’ve been keeping organized, tracking all of my points, which is a key in weight loss.
• I spent lots of time this week cooking new meals and preparing my lunch the night before.  I was great on my eating all week.
• I went to a meeting in spite of the gain.  In the past, when I knew I was going to gain, I would skip the meeting and tell myself I’d “catch up” next week.  Although that never happened, and I got off track pretty quickly that way.  As so many of you have reminded me, those tough weeks are the ones when I need the meeting even more.

Some goals for the coming week:

• Get the activity in every day.  Now that I found a plethora of workouts on my Comcast On Demand, I have no excuse.  The plan is to wake up 20-30 minutes earlier each morning and get in the 30 Day Shred or the Biggest Loser Power Sculpt.  After school, I want to try to get to the gym at least 2 times this week (in addition to the morning workout).  This coming weekend, weather permitting, I want to get in at least 1 long bike ride.  21 APs, minimum, is the goal.
• Continue preparing my lunch the night before, so I’m all set to go in the morning.
• Keep trying new recipes.  It’s been so fun to experiment.
• Continue tracking points for every bite.  It’s important to have the record of what I’m eating, for future reference.

This week I also have several events planned, which will be fun, but means that I need to really stay on top of my activity and tracking even more.  I’m not discouraged at all with this slight gain, and I’m confident that next week’s results will be better.

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